Delayed Love
by Moggie
Summary: [COMPLETE][GCR]&[GSR] She had to wait 3 years for him to notice and those 3 years felt like decades. [Will be GSR]
1. Chapter One: Heartache

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Delayed Love

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Author: Moggie

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Email: moggie_rf@yahoo.co.uk

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Rating: PG-13

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Category: Angst/Drama/Romance

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Spoilers: Some, from all over.

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Summary: [GCR] & [GSR] She had to wait 3 years for him to notice and those 3 years felt like decades.

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Disclaimer: I don't own CSI: Crime Scene Investigation or it's characters, it's all my imagination.

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Note: I have never done a challenge before, but I've actually had this idea festering in my mind too, but never got it further than a passing brain cell spark. Lol. Though I'm breaking out and having a shot. This might be long, so bare with me. It's painfully obvious that I can't write short fics. Lol. Though I've tried.

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Challenge: Write a fanfic that has Grissom with CATHERINE at the beginning, but then have something go wrong (she dies, he realizes he's in love with Sara (after an infinite amount of possibilities) etc...) and make him fall in love with Sara. The only rules are that you have to make the fic believable (including the G/C moments) If you can do this you can believe that you can write amazing fanfics, and call yourself the Ultimate GSR writer. Alison alik2k@yahoo.com

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Warning Note: You may need tissues!

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Chapter One: Heartache

Grissom wondered down the path towards the CSI Lab building early one evening. He looked across the parking lot and let out a long breath when he saw the empty parking space.

"You miss her?"

He turned his head to see dark brown eyes looking at him. "Yeah."

"She'll be missed."

Grissom nodded and sighed, pulling his briefcase tighter under his arm. After a few silent minutes, he turned and looked into those brown eyes. "You're here early Sara."

She shrugged and smiled a little. "Couldn't sleep." She started walking away after he continued to stare at her.

~*~

Nick and Warrick sat at the break room table quietly, both reading the Vegas news in the local papers. Sara was putting a new filter in the coffee machine and absently eating a sandwich at the same time.

"Sara?" Greg called out her name as he stuck his head around the door.

She turned as she took a bite from her sandwich. "Hmm?"

Greg held up a sheet of paper. "Results on your thread."

Leaving the coffee machine, she walked across the room and made a grab for the sheet. "Thanks." She mumbled around her food.

"What about my coke bottle Greg?" Nick asked before Greg could get far.

Deciding it was a good time for a short break, Greg headed for the coffee machine and finished what Sara was doing before he interrupted her. "It's in the process of being processed Nick."

"Did someone put their stuff before mine?" Nick asked, obviously annoyed that someone had jumped the cue.

Greg looked up and turned around as the coffee began to drip through the filter and into the pot. "No." He absently looked around the room and landed on Sara's head. She was reading over her thread results with a frown.

Nick saw the attention Greg was giving Sara and felt a sudden defiant urge to stand and fight this out. "You jumped the cue, didn't you Sara." It was no question.

Sara looked up and stared at the Texan. "What?"

"You put your evidence in front of mine." Again, it wasn't a question.

Sara shifted on her chair and her frown deepened. "I wouldn't do that Nick."

He didn't seem to believe her. "Hey, we all do it, but this case I'm working on is important. I've been waiting on these results all night." He tried to keep his voice even, but anybody in the same room could see he was irritated.

"Nick," Sara shook her head. "Listen, I didn't push you aside, ok?"

"No." He snapped.

Sara stared at him, her frown replaced with a ghost white expression. She had noticed this change in him, and the rest of the staff. It had been the same thing more or less. Something related to a case gets misplaced or jumped in the evidence cue and they looked around for someone to sink their teeth into. Lately, that someone was her.

"Nick!"

Greg, Warrick and Nick turned their heads and looked towards the break room door to see Grissom standing in the doorway with a file in one hand and a ceramic cup in the other.

Grissom entered the room and set both items in his hands, down on the table. He looked around the table and stopped on Nick. "Hodges has your bottle. Go get it." He turned his eyes to Warrick. "Brass is at the Monaco waiting for a CSI." He looked up, not needing to say anything to the other male in the room. Greg went back to work with his fresh coffee grasped tightly in his hand.

Sara stood up and moved to leave the room.

"Sara."

She heard his voice and turned before leaving. "Yeah Grissom?"

He stood up straight and turned to meet her eyes. "Did you jumped the cue?"

When she said she had noticed the change in the rest of the staff, that was her supervisor included. He seemed less than pleasant and even snappy towards her lately, but she couldn't say anything, under the circumstances. 

"No Grissom." She broke eye contact. "I've got to find Vega." She excused herself and went in search of the detective.

~*~

Sitting on her couch the next morning, she could see her reflection on her television set. It was turned off, but she had her police scanner turned on. She stared at herself for a long time, thinking about the past few months, then the past 3 years.

She could remember standing in his office, asking him out to dinner, but being turned down. She was certain that he was preoccupied and couldn't really give her an answer to her offer then, though he gave her a negative reply at the time.

The times they'd sat in the break room drinking coffee and reading on a quiet night or before shift even started. They wouldn't talk much, though they never really talked, unless it was about work. She felt he was taking his time to sort his thoughts out, to settle with himself what he should do and when. She was waiting for him to make the move.

It never happened and she was left to watch it unfold before her eyes.

It started with small glances. All innocent and friendly at first, but then he got more bold and the touching increased. Soon he was touching her hands, arms, back… cheek. It was all happening so fast and she couldn't do anything about it. She watched and waited, just so she could make sure it was nothing more than friends would do.

The kiss shattered her friends theory into billions of little pieces. She stood and watched it play out every time she was near them. She felt sick to her stomach and awfully betrayed, but she had no right to feel these things and as the relationship grew and flooded into the public and lab, she started to feel ashamed, ashamed of herself.

Waiting for the right moment became too late.

She had laughed and cried when she realised she was the one too late. Her over talking had made her look a fool and he no doubt saw her as such. No wonder he doesn't talk to her anymore.

It was another day and Sara was home alone, staring once again at her reflection, listening to the Vegas police enforce the law on it's inhabitancies.

She reached up numbly and wiped the ever falling tears from her cheeks. This had been the same routine every morning since it began. And after being called into work one afternoon, Brass had called her on her cough drop popping session. She hadn't had a drink since and she wasn't going to let it happen again. There was no way out of the bottle if you succumbed to it. She didn't want it to claim her.

Wiping at fresh tears, she gave a soft sigh and dropped her stare from her reflection. She felt stupid and humiliated. There was no way he was going to forgive her after all that had happened. She had fought with herself hundreds of times, arguing that it was all in her head, a fantasy that she thought would come true. She never felt so wrong in her life and it was weighing so heavily on her shoulders, she felt suffocated every time she saw him. It got worse when she witnessed it first hand, the look in his eyes, just how much he loved her.

"God I wish you looked at me like that." She whispered sadly, sniffling as she wiped the tears that were now out of control.

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TBC


	2. Chapter Two: Ashamed

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Chapter Two: Ashamed

Sara collected her field kit and walked down the CSI corridor quietly as she read her assignment slip. An apparent suicide was reported and Vega was waiting for her at the victims house. She had just finished her Office Robbery, nailing the suspect with evidence found at the scene and his apartment with only a thread and dandruff.

She reached her car in time to see Grissom and Brass leaving Grissom's car. She had noticed that too, the absence of the pairing system that was supposed to rotate all CSI's so they could use each other's specialist skills.

It was almost rare to even see a rota for work partners anymore. She was afraid to even ask for a day off because they would be another CSI short and she didn't want to get the looks of 'selfish' tattooed to her already exile status.

Reaching the crime scene, she got straight to work, working comfortably with Vega. He was the only one that seemed to ignore her branded exile and she was grateful, but she also hoped it was out of friendship and not something else. She couldn't handle being tolerated because she was a colleague, she couldn't take that on top of everything else right now. She didn't want to know and made sure she was professional and that nothing accusing came from her mouth when she talked about the rest of the team.

~*~

Waiting just outside the victims house, Sara shined her touch around the yard to keep her mind occupied. She didn't want her personal crisis to leak into her work crisis, though they both seemed tightly wrapped together.

"I hope this is important Sara." Grissom announced his arrival on the scene with a tired grunt. "I was trying to get my paperwork finished before end of shift."

"Oh." She stumbled, clicking off her torch. "Well, I was checking the body when I noticed some brownish flecks." She explained hurriedly as she followed obediently as her supervisor entered the house and followed the stench of rotting flesh.

She watched from a far as he knelt by the bath tub and opened his kit to retrieve a fresh pair of white latex gloves. She rarely got to work with him anymore and this was a moment she treasured. She knew he was avoiding her and she knew why, she just couldn't find a way to apologise without making a bigger fool of herself.

"They're fleas Sara. The vic probably has a cat and the cat was sitting on his chest." He stood and pulled off his gloves as he looked at her.

She cast her eyes down and nodded. "I guess I should have known that." She looked up, glancing at her supervisor before settling on the corps. It was better than watching his disappointment in her once again. "Sorry." She shrugged and left the doorway to retrieve her kit from the living room.

"Where's Vega?"

Sara grabbed her field kit and stood up. "Um… outside I guess." She turned and headed for the bathroom again. "I'll get the evidence to Greg after David collects the body." She informed, passing him in the hallway.

"You're going to stand in the bathroom until the coroner gets here?" He asked.

She stopped in the bathroom doorway and looked at the corps. It's not like she has anywhere better to stand. "He won't be long. I'll just make sure I didn't miss anything."

"You never miss anything." He stated, sounding almost caring.

Sara's chest tightened as she stepped back and returned to the living room to stand awkwardly in front of him. "I was just being thorough." She weakly defended herself.

He was staring at her with an odd expression on his face. She felt the need to leave and hide in her car. She felt like she was about to be branded a new notch on the lecture monitor and all she could think was, that she didn't deserve anything less, if it got him to talk to her. 

She was sure it made him feel better. There was always this light in his eyes when he reached the end of a lecture and though she knew she'd be feeling the ache later, she was certain he would go home and get on with his life, not feeling any guilt.

It was payback time, she gathered. Nothing like years of longing biting you in the ass.

"Sara, you're the most thorough Crime Scene Investigator I know and I wouldn't question your job capabilities."

He sounded like he believed what he was saying, but she knew that it was a lie. Only yesterday did he question her job capabilities, in front of Nick and Warrick.

She opened her mouth to say something, to correct him, but thought better of it when he narrowed his eyes at her and then raised his eyebrows in question. She closed her mouth and looked down. It was time to face it, there was never going to be a time to apologise, she just wasn't brave enough.

Where had all her courage gone. She knew she never let an argument go or so many of her friends walk over her. What had happened to her? Was she finally at the end and ready to give in completely? She couldn't answer, she was so scared of the outcome.

There was no more fight left in her.

And he saw that.

"What?" He prodded. When she didn't go ahead, he took a step forward. "What were you about to say?"

Sara stood there, stunned.

"You were going to say something Sara, what was it?" He continued to stare at her.

Shifting to her other foot, she took a deep breath and told him. "You questioned my job capabilities in front of the team last night." She snapped her mouth shut at the look on his face.

Grissom stepped back and grasped his kit in his hand.

"Not that I minded." She back-pedalled. "I don't expect any special treatment or any-thing." She sighed and closed her eyes as she lowered her head.

A silence settled and she could feel the negative energy coming from him as he breathed in and out. Again, she had over talked and made a fool of herself. Why didn't she just stay quiet? Why didn't she just leave now and never return?

She knew the answer, but was afraid to even think it around him.

"I guess I've been rough on everyone lately." He confessed. "On you, rough on you Sara. I'm sorry." He tried to look at her, but her head was down. He sighed heavily as he continued. "It's just… after Cath-"

"Yeah, I know." Sara breathed and nodded. "I'm sorry Grissom."

He huffed out a laugh and shrugged his shoulders. "You didn't make her leave Sara, she did that on her own."

"Yeah."

Grissom frowned. "I'm sorry Sara. I didn't realise I was taking out my frustrations on you. Forgive me?"

Looking up at his frowning face, she could see he was honest with his apology and his forgiveness, but she knew she had not right to have either. She should be the one asking both those questions and just as the coroner entered the house, she asked him.

"I should be asking for forgiveness and apologising. I'm sorry for everything Grissom." Sara tightened her grip on her case and made a move to walk around him to talk to David.

~*~

Right now she felt nothing more than ashamed of herself. When was she going to stop doing this to herself? Was she destined to be an idiot?

The knock at the door the following morning was a shock and she ignored it for as long as she could as she was once again sat on her couch with tears flowing and her personal pity party in full swing. She couldn't entertain anyone right now and tried to be as quiet as she could.

She leaned over and turned down the volume on the scanner before sinking into her couch cushions to try and be invisible.

The knocking stopped suddenly and she could hear movement outside her door before something crackling. After a few minutes had past and the visitor was long gone did she get up and walk to the door to find a neatly folded piece of paper on the floor. The visitor had obviously pushed the note under the door.

Heading back to the couch, she sniffled and wipe her nose on her Harvard sweater sleeve. Opening the note, she recognised the writing and for some reason it made her cry some more.

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'Can I talk to you later? Ring me at home when you get this note. GG'

~*~

She arrived at work that night with dread written all over her face. She barely slept and she was jumpy. That note was simple, but it scared her. She never rang, she never even thought about ringing. What was he going to talk about anyway?

By the looks of things, she was going to have an answer to her question when Grissom snagged her arm and turned her, propelling her back the way she came and towards his office.

"Can you give me a minute Sara?" He asked gently, quietly, as he looked around the labs to warn off prying eyes.

"Oh uh, sure, Grissom." She stuttered, shocked by his display in front of a few lab personnel.

Releasing her arm, he closed the door and turned around to stare at her for a long time before even speaking. "You didn't call."

Sara breathed in, but didn't let it out until she spoke. "Oh, yeah. Sorry." She flushed, though she didn't know why when it was obvious he was upset. "I guess I didn't get your note." She cringed and forcefully let out another breath.

Grissom scratched his beard and continued to stare. "I see." He began, fitting what she had said together like it was a puzzle. "You didn't ring because you didn't get my note." He watched her shift uncomfortably. "How would you know about the note if you say you didn't get it?"

She started chewing on her bottom lip nervously.

"Sara," He sighed and dropped his tense shoulders in submission. "What did you mean yesterday?"

She looked up and foolishly locked eyes with him. She knew she could lie, but when he had her cornered like this, her lies were weak and pathetic. She didn't want to make this a moment where she'd ruin it with something stupid.

"Just what I said." She shrugged. "I'm sorry, you know, for everything-"

"Be specific."

Breaking contact, she let out a shaky breath. "Erm," She didn't know how to say it. All the time she had spent in the last 3 months thinking about what to say to him, and it was gone in a second.

"Why would you need to apologise to me?" He asked.

"For all the stupid things I've done and all the foolish moments when I'm around you." She stammered greatly, trying to filter together a string of words, but failing.

He stood there for so long that she knew she'd done it again. He was silent after every encounter that she had over talked. 

A despaired growl escaped her when she realised this. "For gods sakes, I did it again." She hastily tried to put things right, words spilling uncensored from her mouth.

"I'm sorry Grissom. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't mean to, honestly. I don't want to make things worse. Not after all that's happened. I'm sorry." She stared at her feet and stiffly wrapped her arms around her. "I guess I shouldn't have come into work. I knew this would happen and, um, I'm sorry."

She made a move to get to the door, but when she turned the handle, she noticed the door was locked. She looked up and stared at the hardwood panel before slowly turning. "Er, doors locked." She stated the obvious.

"I didn't want either one of us leaving before we settled what's going on between us. It's obvious that something's wrong." He leaned back against his desk and looked at her.

Sara could feel her heart palpitating. "Us? I hope you know that I didn't mean to imply anything Grissom. I know how much Catherine meant to you and I'd never…" She stopped talking when her voice began to waver. If she could hear it so could he. When she chanced a look at him, she saw the top of his head as he looked at the floor.

"It's been 3 months since she left Sara. I know everyone is feeling the loss of a team member and friend, but she's not dead." He explained evenly. "Cath could come back anytime if she wanted, but we all know she's not going to do that. She took Lindsey and moved north to stay with her mother. Everyone knows that."

"The money?" Sara asked hesitantly. "She took the money Sam Braun gave her and left?" When he nodded, she took a hesitant step forward. "I'm so sorry Griss."

"Stop Apologising Sara!" He snapped loudly.

Jumping back, she started to shake.

"None of this is your fault. You don't need to be sorry for anything. I should have seen it. She took the money and ran. That's it." He said sternly. After a few silence minutes, he said almost inaudibly. "This isn't all what I wanted to talk to you about."

Not entirely sure she was calm enough to listen, Sara turned to the door and tried it again, knowing full well it was still locked, but she tried anyway.

"It's still locked Sara." He reminded her.

Trying again, she felt tears building. "Open the door Grissom." She tried the handle again. "Please unlock it."

"I love Catherine with all my heart and I gave her everything." He spoke softly, as if remembering.

Sara stared at the door and clenched the handle in her hand.

"3 years of my life, I gave to her and she turned around and took it all, including her love." His voice shook slightly, but he cleared his throat and continued. "I truly thought we were so in love that nothing could come between us, but I was wrong."

Sara pressed her forehead against the door, trying to drown out his voice.

"I didn't see it coming at first. She started lying to me and started pushing me on my political side of the job, knowing damn well I'm not so good at it." He sighed a ragged breath. "She used me to excel in her job and I fell hook line and sinker for it all. The woman I loved used my own faults against me-"

"Stop It!" Sara shouted, turning to glare at him through her tears. "Why Are You Telling Me This!?"

"I need to tell someone Sara." He looked at her with emotional clouded eyes.

"I Don't Want To Hear It Grissom!" She snapped, sniffing and wiping her face with her hands. "Don't you get it? I can't listen to you say this. Not about her." She pleaded desperately, dropping her hands.

Before she knew it, both her worlds crashed together and she suddenly couldn't stop talking. "I stood and watched it all. For 3 years. Holding on just enough to be your friend and be there for you, but what about me?" She asked quietly. "You forgot I even existed Grissom. Once you and her got together, after all I did to try and get you to notice me, I became invisible to you. You saw nothing but her and it pained me, don't you see that."

"What are you saying?" He asked densely.

Sara sniffed loudly and wiped her nose. "I'm saying that I tried to show you we could be good together if you let there be an us, a relationship. But you turned me away after 4 years of making a fool out of myself and you went straight to her. Catherine." She spat out her name like sour lemon on her tongue.

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TBC


	3. Chapter Three: Vacation

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Chapter Three: Vacation

Standing in line at the checkout on a warm and sunny Monday morning with a basket full of groceries, Sara couldn't help but feel relief from her outburst the Friday before. After she had stopped talking, she demanded to be let out of his office or she would scream something he'd regret. After his tactless confession, she was beyond feeling sorry for herself. She finally couldn't stand it anymore and wanted out. Wanted out of it all and when she left his office, she had immediately gone to Director Cavallo and asked to use up a weeks worth of vacation time.

Cavallo had given her the time off to relax and collect herself in hopes she wasn't going to quit. He was in on the gossip going around the lab and he'd been informed of Grissom's less than subtle way of commanding his troops the past few months and was willing to give any of the team some leeway until things settled down.

Knowing it was the only way to gather her wits, Sara had taken on a new hobby and taken time to catch up on much need sleep, mostly with the help of her prescription sleeping pills.

Stacking her bought items into two large brown paper bags, she casually looked over at the other checkout. Taking a double take, she gathered up the rice and bread, not hearing the cashier calling her name.

"Hey Sara."

Snapping out of her momentary lapse of reality, Sara pulled out a few bills and handed them over. "Sorry Joan."

Joan, a cashier for 12 years, smiled at her frequent customer. "No problem." She opened the till and deposited the money, then absently sorted out the change. "How's work?"

Dragging her thoughts to her friend, she shrugged and offered a small smile. "Busy as usual, but I'm taking time off."

Joan gave a mock shocked gasp and grinned. "You, taking vacation, never." She placed the change into Sara's open hand. "$5.34. Well, you have a good rest, you here."

"Thanks Joan. Bye."

~*~

Walking down the street with both bags in her arms, Sara kept her eyes straight ahead so she didn't knock into anyone. After a while, and her path was clear, her thoughts wandered back to the store. She had to take a second look when she saw Grissom standing at the other checkout.

What was he doing there? She kept asking herself. He lived on the other side of town, closer to the lab than either of the team and she knew for a fact that no one on the team lived close to her apartment. She had arrived so suddenly in Vegas that she took the only available place that was close enough to the lab that it wouldn't take more than 20 minutes to get in to work without having to break into an 8 hour sleep.

Although 8 hours was a rare occurrence, she still didn't want to give up time by herself. She valued her privacy as much as anyone, if not more. And seeing Grissom in the same store, shopping for groceries, was more than a surprise as she had never seen him in the vicinity of her side of town. She knew that Brass and Warrick lived closer to Grissom than any others at the lab. Even Greg and Nick lived close enough to visit, but Sara was the only one out of the area for visiting by any workmates.

Maybe he was working a case and stopped at the closest store? Nah, that would be a million to one, but, it could happen.

~*~

Tuesday rolled in and Sara had managed not to break anything in boredom and had finally cleaned her cooker. After a busy morning of tidying and dusting, she grabbed a beer from the fridge and sat out on the balcony to watch the sun shine down on the apartments around hers and listen to children playing, mingled with the sound of busy traffic.

Early the next morning, waiting for the mailman, Sara chatted to her neighbour about the landlord's apartment being vandalised buy youths a few days back.

Mrs. Yuki Jamal was cackling with laughter. She sat on the garden bench in the courtyard of the apartment complex and happily discussed anything with Sara.

"Mr Graves was positively outraged when the youngin's spray painted his front door the next night." Yuki laughed.

Sara chuckled. "He's not the nicest of landlords, but I bet that was an expensive clean up job."

Yuki nodded and gave a final laugh with an ending sigh. "Poor man."

"Yeah." Sara sighed too, reclining back to look up at the blue sky.

Yuki shifted a little before speaking. "How's work? I haven't spoken to you in a long while."

Sara shrugged. "I guess it was busy for a while there."

"Not anymore?" Yuki inquired.

"No." Sara smiled faintly. "I took a week off to rejuvenate."

"Ah, yes." Yuki grinned and patted Sara's hand. "What about this man you were so hung over a while back?"

Sara sighed and lowered her head slightly. "He's not in the picture anymore."

Sensing something wasn't right and that her neighbour wasn't telling the whole true, Yuki shuffled closer and took Sara's hand in hers. "Would you like to talk about it?" She offered.

Smiling and laughing lightly, Sara shook her head and glanced a the elderly lady. Yuki had lived at this apartment complex longer than most living here now. She might have even lived here since the landlord bought the place. She was a nice lady that was spending her retirement on whatever she liked and loving every minute of it.

Sara had to admire her friend. She knew what she wanted and went for it. Not like her. After working for more than 40 years in the sales industry and put money away, Mrs. Jamal was now a widow, mother of three and grandmother to many grandchildren.

Yeah, Sara decided, that woman had it all because she wasn't afraid to go out and get it. No hold ups because she was afraid of what others would think.

Yuki's voice broke through Sara thoughts gently. "I've known you since you moved here Sara, you can tell me anything, you know that, right?"

"Yeah." Sara sighed, rubbing her free hand dry on her jeans. "I guess I was too late," Huffing a sad laugh, she corrected herself. "More like, I was barking up the wrong tree."

"What happened sweetie?"

Feeling like a little of the emotion from the past 3 months come back, she shrugged and sniffled lightly, trying to force the tears back. "Sorry." Sara apologised as she wiped her cheeks.

Yuki smiled softly. "That's ok. Crying helps."

Sara chuckled. "I've not stopped crying since this happened Yuki. I guess I should be over it by now. I'm a grown woman and I'm balling like a teenager."

"It's not easy to give up on love, believe me, I know."

Sara looked at her friend and sighed with a smile. "Thank you for understanding. I haven't talked to anyone who'd understand."

"I'm always here if you need to talk." Yuki offered, giving her a bright smile and squeezing her hand reassuringly.

~*~

Later that day, close to dark, a knock on Sara's door alerted her to a visitor. Though she barely heard the knock, as she was in her spare room, she caught a loud thump and headed for the door. Checking the peephole, she couldn't see anyone on the landing. Frowning, she turned and headed back towards the spare room. 

Another knock.

Stopping, Sara sighed and went back to the door. Pulling the door open, she looked through the gap that the chain allowed. "Hello?"

"Sara."

Recognising the voice, she stared out across the courtyard. "What do you want?"

"Can I talk to you?"

"About what?" She asked, turning the door handle nervously.

"Work."

Listening to the honesty in his voice, she unhooked the chain and pulled the door further open. Only when the door was open did her visitor make themselves seen.

"A case?" She inquired as she stepped to push the door closed.

"Yes."

"Have a seat." She offered, moving to grab her empty plate and glass from the coffee table.

"Sara."

"Give me a second." She called from the kitchen. "What case?"

"Oh, uh, the Willows Case."

Sara stopped rinsing off her plate. "That was a cheap way to get into my home Grissom."

"I know. I'm sorry. I just-needed to talk to you." He stammered.

"What else is there to talk about? We've established that Catherine left. You talked about how much you love her and what she did, but why does this have anything to do with me, Grissom? Please-enlighten me." Sara rattled sarcastically as she stood in the entry way to her kitchen, looking at him standing in her living room.

He looked up slowly. "Sara, I know you hold feelings for me. I've known, for a long time-"

"Is this going somewhere?" She interrupted, not wanting to hear any of this.

"Yes, I think." He paused.

Waiting for him to continue, she folded her arms across her chest.

"Look," He began again. "Since Catherine and I started seeing each other, I thought you would have got the message-"

"The Message!?" Sara snapped.

"Yes-"

"I can't believe this." She growled in disbelief. "You are telling me, now, that you got together with Catherine because of me?"

He nodded, but then changed his mind and shook his head. Then he sighed and started pacing, running his fingers roughly through his hair. "It wasn't like that."

"No!? What was it like Grissom?"

"You know that we would never have worked out. Not then, not under the circumstances." He muttered.

Sara swallowed back the tears and tried to keep her voice from travelling throughout the apartment complex. "And now?" She inquired, glaring at him. "You have had Catherine and now she's gone, you want me to fill in the gaps!?" Her voice rose with harsh anger suddenly.

"No!" He yelled. He turned to her and tried to catch his ragged breath. "I love Catherine. No one could every replace her."

"Who are you trying to convince, you or me?"

"Sara, I'm trying to explain, not hurt you." Grissom snapped, quickly shutting up when he looked up and caught her eyes.

Staring at him, she nodded. "Too late for that." She told him on a sob.

Both fell into silence as they let their words sink in. Grissom moved to sit down on the couch while Sara sat on a stool standing against the breakfast isle. Grissom drew in a deep breath, telling Sara he was about to speak again.

"I've known Cath for a long time, long before we even met. I knew from that moment that you held something, for me. I, just didn't know what it was."

"It wasn't a stupid crush Grissom." Sara said sternly.

He nodded and clasped his hands together. "I know that now." He sighed. "Then, it was hard to grasp what it was. I was confused, but also flattered. It's not everyday a young beautiful woman walks into my life. Especially one that isn't grossed out by what I do for a living."

"Grossed?" Sara questioned. "I was grossed out!" She huffed and tried to hide her smile. "I was so grossed out that I knocked over your jar of cockroaches when you ate that grasshopper."

Grissom chuckled and nodded. "I guess you were grossed out, a little."

Silence fell once again as both remembered that moment in the lecture hall.

"What now?" Sara asked quietly, still not sure what's going on.

"I don't want you to distance yourself from me, or the rest of the team."

She nodded slowly, still not sure. "That's not what I was doing."

He looked at her and frowned. "Sara, you haven't joined any one of us for breakfast after shift since Cath left."

"Let me guess, you don't know why?" She sighed.

"I'm trying to understand."

Sara shifted on the stool. "Griss, haven't you noticed how Nick's treating me?" She watched him think about this for a few minutes and when nothing came, she glared. Great! "I guess not."

"I'm sorry. I've been pre-occupied lately."

She nodded. "I hadn't noticed." She whispered icily.

That set him off and Grissom pushed himself to stand. "This isn't about Catherine!"

"This is about Catherine!" She snapped back. "This is always about Catherine!"

"That's not true." He argued.

Sliding off the stool, she moved forward. "This is about any woman in your life Grissom. Can't you see that!? Yes, I'm upset and even feeling a little stupid right now-" She paused, then continued with a shake of her head. "No, change that. I'm upset and feeling really fucking stupid, even pathetic, right now."

Grissom watched her closely. "You are not stupid Sara. If anything, I'm the idiot. I've really messed things up."

"And now it's turned around and bitten everyone in the ass." Sara added with a mock laugh. "I was thinking that after the little 'confession' in your office last week. And now, it's confirming my thoughts. You messed things up, but I'm the one suffering here, not you." Her voice turned soft, almost silent as she finished speaking. 

"I guess we both mess up someplace." She added as an afterthought.

"It wasn't because I never wanted you." He told her gently, moving forward to try and comfort her.

"It's just, you never felt the same way, that about right?" She asked him, looking at him.

Grissom nodded stiffly. "I can't help what I feel."

"Neither can I." Sara sighed sadly.

Reaching out his hand, he touched her cheek and brushed away a tear. "I really am sorry."

"Me too." She closed her eyes and breathed in his closeness. "Griss?"

"Yeah?"

Feeling his warmth, she sighed on a deep breath. "What are you doing?"

There was silence for a long time before he said anything. "I don't know." He admitted and before he knew what was going on, he had leaned in and kissed her.

Sara's eyes remained closed as she relished in his kiss, though her brain was telling her that this was one, humongous, contradiction in everything they had just argued about.

****

TBC


	4. Chapter Four: Replacement

****

Chapter Four: Replacement

It was when she returned his kiss that she first noticed it. The distinct taste of alcohol on his breath. The whole time he was here, the whole time he was arguing, he was drunk.

Sara corrected herself and pulled back slowly. "You're drunk." She watched his eyes flutter open.

Taking a moment to think, he sighed. "No. I'm not Sara."

Not believing what she was hearing or what had just happened, she pushed hard against his chest and stormed away from him. "You are drunk." She hissed, running her hand over her face.

"Sara, I'm not drunk." He insisted.

Turning to him, she couldn't stop the tears from once again falling. "You taste like whiskey Gil."

Taken back by his first name on her lips, he closed his eyes. "I only had one drink."

"Is that the courage you needed to come in here Grissom?" She asked testily as she wiped her face free of tears. "The drink give you the chance to face me?"

"Yes." He answered honestly. "It did help me, but I would have come sooner of later."

"Why not sooner, huh? Why leave it til' now?"

"I," He stopped and moved a few steps towards the couch, his back to her.

"Why Grissom!?" She demanded loudly.

He spun around. "Because you scare me! Because you confuse my head!" He shouted, sudden anger fuelling his words. "Because I feel something too!"

Sara clenched her hands into fists. "You are just SAYING THAT!"

"I'm Not!"

By now, gravity had them closing in on each other. Both were angry and tense.

"You can't say those things when your with another woman!" Sara pointed out, clearly angered that he was trying to lie to her.

"I can't help being in love with both!!" He roared, turning to storm away from her. His foot connected with the couch and he reflexively kicked it, hard, making the heavy frame jump from the floor and land with a loud thud.

Staring at the couch as it landed, she drew in a deep breath and held it, trying to fathom what he had just said. How can you love two people? She asked herself, then it hit her and her head snapped up with a gasp falling from her mouth.

Grissom looked back at her and sighed sadly. "I didn't want to say that."

"Why not?" She hesitantly asked. "Why come here at all if that's the real reason you came here in the first place. It's obvious now why you came." Sara shook her head and felt her whole body shrink in realisation. "I'm not going to do it Gil, no." She looked at him with a stern look through her dried tears. "I'm not her replacement. You can't come here and expect me to fall for that line. I will not fall into bed with you because you miss Catherine."

"That wasn't why I came."

"No?" She questioned. "Haven't you been listening to what you're saying? Because you just told me that you love me, and, Catherine. That it wasn't your intention to fall in love with her, but then you tell me you did it to show me you didn't want anything more than friendship from me. 

"How can I believe you when you keep going in circles, saying one thing, meaning another? Then kissing me after saying you couldn't help loving her over me, only to be under the influence the entire time you've been here." She glared at him before finishing.

"I don't think I'll ever be able to believe anything you ever say again."

He stood there with a look of utter shock and panic on his face.

Shakily, Sara opened her door and waited. She watched him hang his head and walk slowly from her apartment, onto the landing and down the steps. In complete silence.

~*~

Sitting in her room in the dark, she couldn't think clearly. She had tried to, but things got in the way. Things like the argument, the kiss, the whole 3 years, the 3 months and the look on his face after she'd told him she'd never believe him again. It haunted her when she closed her eyes. She knew it would haunt her when she would sleep too.

She felt overwhelming guilt.

Maybe she should have given him a chance.

Mentally giving her head a quick shake, Sara sighed and stared up at the ceiling. She had nothing to be guilty about. She had listened, she had argued and she had uncovered his reason for doing what he had done and why he was at her apartment. 

What did he think was going to happen? Did he think they wouldn't stop at the kiss and that, somehow, they'd end up going further? He must had known she'd figure it out that he'd been drinking as soon as he kissed her. It obviously didn't occur to him that she'd notice.

Even if she chose to ignore it, and slept with him, what would he want after it? Would he want it to happen regularly or would he only want it to happen when he missed Catherine and needed something to make him feel alive?

She didn't know if she could do that, that's why she couldn't let the kiss go any further. She knew that in the end, he'd choose Catherine and she'd be left to deal with what happened between them.

The only thing that was immediately worrying, was the fact that she had to work with Grissom when she went back to work Saturday night. 

~*~

Wednesday turned out to be a busy day, considering it was Sara's third day of vacation. She had opted to help Yuki with her daily errands so she didn't have to think about Grissom too much. Though the distraction helped, it didn't completely push him far from her thoughts.

As they were walking through the grocery store, Sara smiled at Yuki as she bumped into someone at the fruit and veg display.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Yuki laughed as she bent to pick up a bag of apples that had fallen from the other persons hands.

"That's alright,"

Sara's head turned rapidly, the movement jarring her neck and hurt for a few painful minutes as she looked from Yuki to the man standing beside her.

Yuki smiled and watched as the man looked from her to Sara. "Well, I'm Yuki," She introduced herself, then moved to push Sara forward. "And this is my friend, Sara."

"We know each other." Sara said hastily. "Let's go Yuki."

"Oh, okay. Nice to meet you…" She smiled warmly at him.

"Grissom." The man answered.

Yuki nodded and smiled again as she reached for a bag of apples.

Further down the isle of canned food, Yuki looped her arm around Sara's and sighed. "I take it that's the one." She new the answer when Sara want to leave, but she felt it was time to ask some more questions to help her friend.

"Yeah." Sara sighed. "He's the one."

"He's so handsome."

"Mhmm." Sara nodded as she pulled some canned fruit from the shelf.

"You can tell me to shut up anytime, but," Yuki teased with a bright smile, which was responded with a light laugh from Sara. "What's going on between you two?"

Sara looked behind them. "His girlfriend left him a few months back."

Yuki's eyebrows rose. "Oh." She intoned.

"Yeah." Sara nodded. "Apparently he loves her, but he loves me too."

The seriousness in Sara's voice made Yuki wonder what else was going on and what had happened since yesterday morning.

"That's some serious stuff." Yuki huffed, picking up a tin of mince beef.

Sara chuckled. "You think?"

Yuki nodded. "Look at it this way, he told you."

"Only because he was drunk." She informed her.

"Oh." Yuki smiled slightly.

"That was after he kissed me." Sara continued. She looked at Yuki and couldn't help laughing at the animated look on her face. "It's not funny."

"I know." Yuki grinned. "What else happened?"

"He was trying to get me into bed. That's what would have happened if I didn't stop it."

"You didn't want to sleep with him?" Yuki asked.

Sara shook her head, but said. "Well, yes, I did, but not like this."

"You stopped it because you didn't want him to leave in the morning, thinking he could come back any time he wanted when he didn't want to be alone anymore."

Sara stopped walking and turned to her friend with a frown. "You think I'm being stupid, don't you?"

Yuki gasped. "Of course not! I think what you did was very brave. You knew what would happen before it even, happened." She smiled a little before sighing. "You care enough not to let that happen to both of you. He should be grateful that you stopped it when you did." Waiting a breath of a second, Yuki added. "You must really like him."

"I can't deny that I love him, but I'm not going to be Catherine's replacement." Sara said determinedly.

"Good for you sweetie." They started moving again and reached the checkout. "Why don't you go get a tub of ice cream while I wait in line." Yuki smiled as she stood behind a line of six people.

Sara smiled and nodded. "Ok. Be right back. No sweets!" She teased cheekily.

Once Sara had turned, Yuki's hand snaked out and grabbed a snickers bar. She turned back to the line and looked up to see a young man standing in front of her with a wide grin. Yuki chuckled and whispered. "Don't tell her." The young man nodded and grinned.

~*~

Sara looked at the ice cream in the long freezer, trying to choose one from a vast variety. The cold that seeped up and out from the coolers, chilled her body as she stood and made her choice.

"I would guess you're a chocolate kinda gal." Grissom teased from behind.

Turning slowly, Sara sighed, not wanting his teasing or his presence at this time, not so soon after their confrontation, of sorts.

"What are you doing here?" She asked.

"Shopping." He held up his basket for emphasis. "What about you, what are you doing here?"

"I'm shopping with Yuki."

"She seems like a nice lady." He offered.

Sara nodded. "She is."

"Good."

"Yeah."

No body spoke for a while and soon Sara turned away and reached for a tub of chocolate ice cream.

"Sara, I'm sorry about yesterday."

"Yeah, well, you were drunk." She dismissed as she place the tub into her other hand, swapping it back and forth to escape the immediate chill.

Grissom sighed. "I wasn't drunk. One drink doesn't mean I was incapacitated."

"Really? So you're not going to deny everything you said, or did?" Sara challenged, raising an eyebrow, urging him to answer.

Shifting from one foot to the other, he thought about what had happened, like he had all night. He looked at her and took a step closer. "I don't deny it. I want to apologise. I was upset and feeling alone."

"That doesn't give you any right to come to my home and try and talk me into bed Grissom." She shot back in a quiet hiss.

Grissom glanced up and down the isle before responding. He moved towards her and lowered his voice. "I didn't want it to look that way, but yes." He admitted. "One of my intentions was to get you into bed. I'm sorry."

Sara stepped back in shock at his admission. Why was she listening to this again? She had told him that she was never going to believe a thing he said again, so why was she listening?

She cleared her throat and closed her eyes briefly. "You would have left and it wouldn't have stopped there." She told him. "I probably would have let it happen if I didn't realise you had been drinking."

"I'm sorry I put you in that position. I'm sorry I'm doing this to you now, but Sara," He sighed. "I can't stop it." He took a final step and looked deep into her eyes. "I can't stop how I feel."

"You're only doing this because she's gone. You'll leave once she comes back." Sara struggled to keep her voice even.

"She's gone."

"She'll come back, you know it."

Grissom closed his eyes and breathed in, taking in the sweet smell of her perfume. "Why are you stopping this before it's even started?"

"Because it's not what you really want." Sara sniffled, finally letting her tired emotions show. "I would have let you in before this all started, but no anymore. You hurt me on purpose then and your hurting me on purpose now. I can't let this happen anymore. I know how you really feel, about her, about me and I won't let you use me." She pushed away from him and found Yuki waiting at the checkout.

~*~

Grissom sat in his office that night, thinking over what he was doing to Sara. He couldn't help himself as he cornered her in the grocery store that morning. Something griped him and he had to be close to her. For some reason, since he kissed her, he couldn't stop thinking about the softness of her lips or the warmth of her body again his. It was killing him to see her in so much pain, all because his heart was conflicted between two woman he loved more than anything in the world.

He had to choose and he had to do it fast. He needed Sara in his life, but Catherine was there, and understood him when he needed someone to talk to. But after a long relationship with his once, best friend, he realised that that's all she wanted. She didn't want marriage, she didn't want more children, she didn't want anything more than she already had, except money and control.

And she got both.

Grissom had been beating himself up so much in the past few months. He's a trained CSI, the most experienced of the lot of them and he didn't even see that his own friend and lover, was pulling the wool over his eyes. He let himself become blind to her unfaithfulness so he could live with the knowledge that she was the only one that would accept him for who he is and not what other's saw him to be.

The only person left was Sara and he was torturing her with his hastiness to put things right. He didn't want to waste more time, but after the past few days, he knew he needed to go slow to win her friendship and if she'd allow it, her heart too.

****

TBC


	5. Chapter Five: Trust

****

Chapter Five: Trust

Standing at her door, Sara leaned the box she was holding against the hinge with her hip so she could get her key into the locks.

"Shit." She cursed, grasping the keys again so they didn't slip from her sweaty hands.

The box was resting on her hip and each movement she made to unlock the door, the box moved.

"Damnit." She chuckled to herself as she sighed and placed the box on the floor. She could easily unlock the door and push it open.

Grabbing the box from the floor, she lifted it and carried it inside before returning to the door and closing it. Before she could get it closed, she felt a weight on the hardwood, stopping her from closing it. The weight accompanied a knock, making her jump.

"Yeah?"

"Need some help?" The all too familiar voice offered.

Sighing, she pulled the door open and stared at her boss. "Bit late for that."

He shrugged. "Well, you just put the box down before I got to the top of the steps." He smirked and shrugged his shoulders again.

"And you're here, why?" She asked, their confrontation from the past few days still in her system.

"I was hoping you were free for a drink."

Sara looked down and let out a short puff of air. "After what has happened, you really think I'd go anywhere with you?"

"I'd like to start over."

"Go away Grissom." She sighed.

He stepped back onto the landing. "I only want to make things right Sara."

She nodded. "And you did."

"No, I messed up. I made a fool out of us both and I want to make it up to you."

"We've said all we had to. None of it made sense and it only made things worse. We can't fix this Grissom, face it."

"I'm trying to fix it. Fix us."

Sara shook her head slowly, looking at him with a furrowed brow. "According to you, you want Catherine, you love Catherine and you miss Catherine. I'm not Catherine and never will be."

He sighed. "Sara, I know. And I'm trying. I've thought long and hard and I need to get on with my life. I've been blind long enough. Sara please, let me get our friendship back."

She watched him and scrutinised him until he started to shift uncomfortably. "No." She moved back and slammed the door, throwing the deadbolt and sliding on the chain.

It was quiet for a long time and as she moved away, she heard his voice shout through the door.

"I Will Sara! I Won't Give Up!" There was a pause before he continued, his voice sounding very close to the door. "I want you in my life."

~*~

Sara carefully collapsed the box that held her new VCR, and grabbed the trash bag on the way to the door. For some reason, she felt watched. It was a common feeling on a dark night, but this feeling had been following her for the past few days.

Jumping at the sound of something falling over in the shadows, she cursed herself when she noticed one of the neighbour's cats chasing a mouse across the courtyard. "Stupid animal." She sighed, walking down the steps to the ally that led to the large bins.

As she was closing the gate, she heard footsteps coming from the front of the apartment complex, but gave no second thought as it was, most like, another neighbour.

Walking up the steps to the first floor, Sara bent down and stood a fallen milk bottle up against the wall. She was about to stand when she felt her head connect with the wall like she had been pushed from behind.

A struggle ensued and as Sara soon realised that she was sitting on the ground, watching a fight going on behind her. Then it suddenly stopped.

"Grissom?"

Breathing heavily, he stumbled forward and sank to the floor in front of her. "Hey."

Shaking the fog from her eyes, she looked behind his head and saw a dark figure running down the steps and off into the alley where she'd just come from. The sound of the gate was the only sound that followed rapid running footsteps.

Turning her attention back to the man in front of her, she sighed. "I'm seriously considering getting a restraining order on you." She groaned as she reached up and felt the top of her head.

Grissom, still catching his breath, shook his head slowly. "Good thing I'm following you or that sicko could have done some real damage." Leaning forward, he cupped her face with one hand and took her hand with the other. "Let me see." He asked gently, moving onto his knees to use the landings lamps to inspect her injuries.

Sara sat there tiredly and sighed. "Is it just a scratch?" She inquired, moving her head to see his face.

He nodded. "Little bump, but you're just fine." He sat back before moving to stand. "Come on, let's get you up."

Taking his offered hands, she stood. "Thanks, I guess."

"You're welcome." He smirked, tilting his head down slightly, giving a shy look.

"I'm still thinking of that restraining order." She warned him, turning to open her apartment door.

"I'm only watching out for you."

Sara sighed patiently. "Grissom, you're following me like a stalker. Haven't you got anything better to do?"

He shook his head. "No."

Turning slightly, she looked at him as he moved forward and her living room lights shone on his face. "Come in then. You can wash your face and hands before going."

"Thanks."

Leaning against the breakfast island, Sara waited for Grissom to finish up in the bathroom. And soon enough, he was out and wandering into the room with a tired look on his face, covered in tiny scratches.

"Come here and sit down." She ordered, pulling out a stool for him to sit on.

As he sat down and propped his feet on the horizontal pipes separating the legs close to the floor, Sara turned to him with a wad of cotton wool and a bottle of medical first-aid alcohol. Dampening the wool, she looked at him. Not bothering to say anything, she stepped a small step closer and gripped his chin in one hand as she applied the alcohol to the tiny cuts, without much tenderness as you can imagine.

"Ouch." He hissed, pulling back slightly. "It hurts." Stating the obviously, his eyes locked onto hers, watching them closely.

"Good. Now stop moving." She replied evenly, giving no care to her words or her first-aid skills.

Watching her get a clean wad of wool, he sighed and closed his eyes briefly.

"Aren't you supposed to be working?" Sara spoke, startling him.

Nodding, he drew in a sharp breath as she wiped the wet wool along another cut. "I took a break." He groaned, pulling slightly back from her reach as the sting stuck around a little longer.

"Well," She started. "You're all done." She dropped the used wool onto the unit and attempted to step back.

Grissom reached out and grasped her hips, hooking his fingers into her belt loops. "Sara, are you going to the police?"

"I'm thinking about it. You're behaviour is starting to freak me out." She informed him, gripping his forearms to push them away.

"No, about the assault." He pulled her closer and dipped his head to see her face and watch her eyes.

"Did you see his face?" She asked, looking up questioningly.

"No." He sighed, shaking his head. "I didn't really touch him either. Just grabbed him and pushed him away from you."

Sara nodded and peered closely at his face, eyeing the scratches. "Those look like floor scuff marks, not nail indentations, so, no DNA."

"Yeah, he jumped on me and pushed me against the wall. That's about it before he ran."

"Yeah."

"I think you should still report it to the landlord so he can get the police to look into it." Grissom suggested.

"I'll do that." She finally gave up pushing on his arms and looked at the clock on her kitchen wall. "You should get back to work."

"I will. There's plenty of time."

"There won't be if you don't go now." She told him.

Grissom shrugged. "I'm only interested in you at the moment. Not the lab."

"You can't keep doing this Grissom." She groaned miserably. "What else do you want me to say?"

Taking a moment to think, he released her and let his hands rest lightly on her waist. "Can you forgive me?" He asked, staring at her stomach before his eyes drifted up to her face. "I've been so stupid." He confessed. "I really want to put things right, like they were 3 years ago."

Sara sighed sadly. "You can't erase the past Griss, it's fixed." She closed her eyes briefly, thinking of a way to express what she was currently feeling, but came up with nothing but what she was feeling right now. "I'm SO, angry, with YOU." She cried passionately, opening her eyes to look at him with sorrow and pain.

"Let me take that anger away." He stressed, his voice crackling with emotion.

Shaking her head, she looked down. "You make me so angry, that I feel I can hate you." She found his eyes quickly when he leaned back. "After all that's happened, I can't help that feeling."

"I'm sorry." He pleaded with her to believe him, his face drained white with fear. "I'm so sorry."

"How can I trust you with anything, Griss? My heart isn't up for more emotional beatings. All I feel is sadness, hate and hurt. Betrayed by something that was never there, but it still hurts, ya know?" She whispered softly, tearfully.

He nodded slowly, pulling her closer to him as he stood up to hold her. "Can I try?" He begged, wrapping his arms around her shaking body. "Can I work for your trust and show you I feel the same, even after all I've done, can you let me do that?"

Sara breathed out shakily, giving in to lean her cheek against his shoulder and hug him back for the briefest of seconds, just to feel him once.

Stepping away, she nodded, giving him his answers in one motion.

Drawing in an unsteady breath, she wiped her tears away. "You better go."

Grissom stepped forward and touched her cheek lightly. "One chance, that's all I'm asking for."

"Ok. Now go." She pushed him towards the door, not watching him leave.

~*~

Grissom glanced around the crime scene for the last time before crouching down to his field kit. He pulled out his gloves and placed them into an evidence bag with two other pairs.

"Get hold of Nick so he can start questioning the neighbours." He looked up at Warrick as he placed the bottle of luminol into his kit.

"Sure Griss." Warrick reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. "What about Greg, you want me to get him in on this?"

Grissom nodded as he closed his kit. "Just make sure he doesn't collect evidence and that you or Nick is with him at all times."

"Cool."

"Hey, Gil!" Jim Brass called from his unmarked police car.

Turning on his haunches, Grissom looked over at the detective. "Yeah?"

"The vics wife was just pulled over for a busted taillight. She's been taken to the station."

"Ok. I'm done here."

~*~

Surprisingly enough, things did go back to normal for a few days. Everyone was dedicated to their work like always and suspects came and went with each new and old case. Grissom had taken to working slower than he had over the past few months, taking his time to think about things. Nick and Warrick started competing against each other again on the games console in the break room, while Greg worked in his lab and studied forensics on his break. He was determined more than ever to become a CSI.

Sara's first night back in a week was busy. Working on the same case Grissom and Warrick were working on days before. Nick went solo on a floater and was still out gathering evidence and suspects. So far, it was looking like an accident, but he had to be thorough.

~*~

Warrick ran the red light over the clothes of the victim again, getting the same results, nada. "Oh man, this really sucks. Don't tell me we've run into a wall after days of running with evidence." He crooned disbelievingly.

"Greg's still replicating that blood you found on the wall." Sara informed him as she flipped a page on her clipboard, scanning the information before her eyes.

"Yeah, that was like 3 days ago." Warrick sighed, packing up the equipment he'd been using.

Sara rolled her shoulders and neck to release some of the tension. "Guess he's backed up."

Warrick looked down at his pager as it beeped. "Yes!" He grinned, removing his gloves. "Be right back."

"Sure." Sara didn't look up from her reading and dropped her shoulders slightly. She breathed out a heavy sigh and tapped her pencil on the edge of the table.

"Hey." Grissom greeted as he entered the room.

Sara jumped, dropping her pencil to the table. "Hey, you get anything on the wife?"

Grissom shook his head and moved around the table towards her. "Not yet. Brass said that she has an alibi and that she was no where near the house at the time of the murder."

"You'd think she'd be upset that her husband was dead." Sara thought aloud as she returned to her reading.

He nodded in agreement as he moved around her. "You got anything?"

Shaking her head, she looked at him. "Other than in and outgoing calls and mail received, I can't find a bad word against the vic."

Grissom shrugged. "Doesn't matter anyway." He looked down at the table.

"The sheriff said to let it go, right?" She asked.

"He says that the wife is well protected. And I heard from sources, that anyone she knows will lie for her. That doesn't leave us with much to go on."

"Unless Greg has something for us." Sara looked at her watch.

"You," Grissom hesitated for only a second. "You want to get breakfast after shift?" He looked from the evidence on the table to her expressionless face. "Only, if you want." He watched and waited for an answer.

Sara broke away from his eyes and looked out at the corridor. It was empty, and though the sounds of the lab didn't seize, it was still quiet.

"We don't have to." He sighed.

"I guess it would be ok," She relented, then added. "And I'm kinda hungry."

Grissom nodded and gave her a small smile. "I'll meet you out front after shift."

****

TBC


	6. Chapter Six: Distraction

****

Chapter Six: Distraction

[Thanks Xanti for betaing for me!]

Sara stood outside in the lab parking lot, waiting for Grissom to come out. Although he hadn't mentioned the breakfast invitation since he had asked, she was still under the impression that it was still on.

Thinking it over for a minute, Sara contemplated going home and forgetting about breakfast entirely. She didn't want to think about the meaning behind the breakfast meeting. If she did that, she knew she would be in for another disappointment.

The last thing she wanted was for this to distract her from her work, or her personal life. She had only just managed to pull through the last few months without completely losing it.

Now, all she wanted was something stable and honest. If Grissom couldn't give her that now, she might as well give up all together and pack her bags. She was done wasting life on a fantasy.

Checking her watch for the first time, she made a decision that would most likely result with him on her doorstep once again. That restraining order was looking so promising at this very moment. 

And the thought brought a fleeting smirk to her face, the first brief smile she had shown in a long while.

Digging into her pockets, she grasped her car keys, but hesitated when removing them. Sighing in resignation, she knew her heart was already shaking from the pain it had gone through, and decided in that moment to go home.

Just as she was closing the driver's door, she looked up to see the man on her mind standing on the curb, watching her with a noticeable deep frown.

She opened the door as he began walking towards her. Though she didn't move to exit the vehicle, she watched his approach.

"I thought we were going to breakfast." He inquired, his voice holding a steady tone while his face showed concern and confusion.

"We 'were', but I can't." Sara said evenly, watching him closely.

Grissom sighed and scratched his beard. "You have stuff to do?"

She shook her head and leaned back.

"Oh." He sighed again, realisation hitting him hard in the stomach. Waiting a beat, he leaned stiffly against the inside of the door to get a better look at her as he spoke softly.

"Sara, I'm not asking for anything more than breakfast between two friends. That's it." He shrugged slightly and focused his eyes somewhere other than her for a few minutes. "And, if it develops into more than that," He paused and looked at her. "I want you to know that I promise I won't hurt you."

She closed her eyes for a moment and released a tired breath. Her head rolled in his direction so she could look into his eyes. "Grissom, as much as I want this, I can't have it. Not anymore, not when your heart is obviously elsewhere. I can't make you love me and I don't want to-"

"I do love you." He blurted as he slid closer, his face mere inches from hers.

"And your heart?" She asked, trying not to cry. She had done too much of that in front of him as it was.

"Will always be yours." He breathed. He looked into her eyes and smiled as he watched her closely.

From her position, Sara could see his whole face and nothing much else. He was close to kissing her and she didn't want that. Well, she did, but not yet. She still didn't trust him. He had lost all his chances and was at this moment, on his last wish. No more chances after this.

"Get this right." She told him.

"Breakfast?" He asked, inching forward.

She nodded. "I'll meet you at the diner."

"Ok." He said quietly as he closed the distance between them.

Sara watched his smile widen when she pushed back on his chest. Her smile broke out as he raised his eyebrows and licked his lips. "Still a long way to go before any of that Griss."

Grissom sighed and pouted as he turned on his heels and strode off towards his car.

~*~

The expression, time flies when you're having fun, could actually describe the past 6 weeks. Though the time was used in public places for short periods of time, it was always amazing what you could fit into a few small hours.

No romantic gestures. No longing looks. No innuendo. No contact. Nothing that would symbolise a date or anything other than a friendly outing with a friend. Talking was difficult at first, but the places visited gave openings to start stimulated conversation that could and did, last for hours.

This trusting business was what it was. It was finding that comfortable place inside someone and giving out a safety net that another could fall back on when needed.

This was hard to find after everything that had happened between them.

~*~

"Date." Grissom blurted, looking up from his desk and focusing his eyes on Sara, who was standing in his office with her arms crossed over her chest defiantly.

"What?" She asked, confused by the sudden change in subject. One second they were arguing about a case and then the next minute he blurts the word 'date'.

Removing his glasses to rub the bridge of his nose, he looked up at her and repeated. "Date. I want to take you on a date." He dropped his glasses onto his desk and pushed his chair back to stand.

"Erm, Griss-" Sara stammered, momentarily stunned as she tried to shift tracks and concentrate on what he was saying. Her argument about the case she was working on was important to her and she was caught off guard as he had immediately shifted gears after telling her she had to wait until morning before contacting a judge for a warrant. She was about to suggest another judge when he changed the subject.

"I think it's time Sara. It's been over a month." He moved around his desk and stood in front of her.

Finally getting her brain to catch up, she shook her head and narrowed her eyes. "That's exactly what it's been, a month and 2 weeks. That's not enough time to establish trust, let alone forgiveness and a number of other stuff that has to come first."

Grissom nodded his head, but still pushed the suggestion. "I want to date you and do that too. It's the only way I can think of to get your faith in me, back."

Sara stared at him long and hard before shaking her head again. "I don't think so Grissom. Just 3 days ago we were at this very point and the answer is still the same. No."

"Why not?" He demanded with a heavy sigh.

"I'm not ready." She answered simply and shrugged sadly. "I don't trust you."

"You trust me here?" He asked, pointing a hand towards the labs.

"With my life, yes, but not out there." She tilted her head slightly to look at him curiously. "Why did you ask that?"

Looking down at his feet a moment, he stepped forward on a sigh. "This is where I want your trust. The rest can come later. I'll work hard for it everyday, but here is where I want it to be known."

"Known?" Sara asked before realising what he was meaning. "Oh." She breathed. "That wasn't what I had in mind."

"It's were we should start." He suggested. "Right where it all began. Here. In the lab."

Starting to feel uncomfortable with the idea, Sara began to fidget and look around the room. "I don't know Griss." She said in an almost quiet whisper. "The guys are only just starting to move on with their lives. This could put me in the dog house with the entire lab, especially Nick and Warrick."

Grissom looked concerned. "Dog house? Why?" He reached out and touched her arms as he stepped closer, trying to comfort her as she began rubbing her palms together nervously.

"Don't you remember what it was like before I came here?" She asked. "I can imagine it was much better than when I finally got here." She looked him in the eyes. "Catherine didn't want me here in the first place and neither did Nick or Warrick. I had to work for their respect and it took me a long time too. I wasn't just the new kid, but the teachers pet and workaholic."

"So?" He questioned. "That doesn't mean the guys are going to disrespect you after all this time."

She smiled sadly. "Since Catherine left, it's been like I was the new kid all over again. I've been working hard to get that respect back because it was taken away so easily." She shrugged. "That doesn't make me feel any better because of their loyalty to you and Catherine. Whatever you two say goes. Whatever you two do, goes."

"That has been the way since before I got here. And whenever a tough patch hits, its blame the new kid. Get your kicks in while you can." She talked animatedly, dropping her hands from their wringing grip.

Grissom took her hands in his and gently rubbed them to smooth out the red blotches that had formed when she was strangling them in her tight hold. Though this was an unspoken rule, the touching, he couldn't help himself.

"I doubt it was exactly like that, but I can only imagine it was tough." He consoled, releasing one of her hands to touch her cheek. "Don't let them get to you."

"But they are going to blame me!" She exclaimed in a voice that was close to frustration.

"What for?" He asked sternly, but knowing the answer. "For making Cath leave?" His eyebrows shot up when she looked at him with a cold glare. "You had nothing to do with that!" He sighed and tried to relax.

"That won't be how they will look at it."

"Maybe, but we know the truth. I know the truth." He assured her. "I have really fucked up Sara." He snapped, but not in anger, in frustration and concern. "I may love Catherine-"

Sara didn't like that one bit and tried to withdraw from his closeness and his hold on her hands and face.

Grissom dipped his head to catch her eyes. "As a friend. I may love Catherine as a friend, but I sure don't hold the depth of feelings that are inside me right now, for anyone else but you."

Sensing something in his voice, she looked into his eyes and found what she had heard. Love. True love.

"I love you. No one else." He narrowed his eyes in thought. "Maybe that damned lab rat, but-" He smirked as Sara spat out a laugh. "But not in that way, you know." He finished with a chuckle.

"I'm sure Greg will be pleased to hear that." She taunted, laughing lightly.

"I'm sure Greg would." He agreed. Waiting for their laughter to subside, he watched her closely. "So, what do you think, you think it's time?"

Sara breathed out slowly and nodded reluctantly. "I hope you're right about the guys." She told him unsurely. "Because I don't know if I can do this if they don't approve."

Grissom nodded and gently leaned his forehead against hers with a relieved smile and sighed. "I'll be right beside you." He promised.

~*~

Feeling up to something more adventurous than a museum or a walk down the strip, Grissom surprised Sara by driving a few miles out of Vegas and towards the smaller towns bordering the city of lights.

Pulling up to a large farm, the bright lights and loud music could be seen and heard by all.

Grissom walked around the car and met Sara at the front. "You're going to love this." He grinned.

Sara looked dubious, but smiled as he grabbed her hand and tugged gently to get her feet moving.

Entering through enormous open doors to the barn, they were greeted with hoards of town folk dancing, drinking, talking and singing. They filled the building, but there was a path straight down the middle towards a makeshift bar.

"What would you like?" Grissom shouted over the music.

Sara shrugged and glanced around, holding onto Grissom's hand so she didn't get lost.

"Two beers." She heard him call to the lady behind the bar. He turned and leaned back against the wooden structure. "So?" He asked, pulling on her hand so she was standing closer to him.

"It's nice." She grinned.

Grissom nodded and smiled at her. He paid for the beers and they moved away to find a group of tables that were near the front. Sitting for a while, talking and looking around, the music changed several times to play different types of music so it would appeal to the many different age groups that were present.

"How'd you find this place?" Sara asked, leaning against Grissom's shoulder so he could hear her.

Tilting his head towards her, he smiled. "A friend owns the farm."

"You have a friend?" She asked.

Grissom turned his head slightly so he could see her teasing smile and bright eyes. "Yeah, just one." He deadpanned.

Sara snickered and playfully bumped him with her shoulder.

Listening to the music, Sara grabbed Grissom's hand that was resting on the table and stood. "Come dance with me." She pulled on his hand.

Without much argument, he jumped up and followed her. Though he wasn't sure if he could dance to the music that was playing, he was going to try, for Sara.

Getting into the beat, Sara grasped Grissom's arm as she swung her hips to the music. She was smiling and laughing as she watched him dance with her. It was probably something 20 years olds did in clubs, but the fun they were having and several dozen other people on the floor, was something they wouldn't forget in a hurry.

Grissom pulled her closer to him as he shifted his feet and moved his body to match hers, which was a bit more difficult given that he wasn't as young as he used to be.

By the time the music came to an end, they were laughing and giggling, hanging onto each other and talking loudly to one another.

The band started playing a slow song and nearly half the barn was on their feet and dancing with a partner.

Sara wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her body lightly against his. Grissom's own arms were positioned around her waist and his face was resting against hers, cheek to cheek.

Being so close to him was beyond what she thought was going to happen tonight. Dinner and talking was all she had conjured up, but this, dancing, laughing and joking, was something she had only dreamed would happen.

Grissom's hands joined on her lower back. The music was soft and slow, giving them time to hold each other close enough to feel each other's heartbeats.

Sara had her eyes closed and her head leaning on his shoulder, her arms moved to his sides to hold onto the fabric of his long sleeved shirt. The smell of aftershave wafted to her nose and she breathed it in before letting out a relaxed sigh.

Not breaking the moment with talk, Grissom quietly and softly caressed her spine and placed a kiss on her exposed neck.

Shivering against the touch, Sara leaned against him some more and slid her arms around his body to hold him tightly. The chance to hold him and hug him was something she wanted to treasure. Even though the night had turned out to be both fun and intimate, she still felt as though everything wasn't going to stay like it was now. Something was going to change and their time was going to run out, quick.

"Don't let this evening end." She whispered into his ear.

Grissom pulled back slightly. His eyes gazed into hers before trailing over her face. His examination ended at her lips and there was an overwhelming heat that settled on them, encasing both of their bodies like an inferno.

"I don't think I could." He murmured, finding her eyes again.

Sara smiled and kissed him quickly on the lips. "Let's get something to eat."

"Ok." He chuckled.

****

TBC


	7. Chapter Seven: Warmth

****

Chapter Seven: Warmth

[Thanks to Milander and Csibugman for reading this chapter, but a slapped wrist for tricking me into giving them the chapter in the first place.]

It was long past midnight and the barn was still loud and lively. Grissom and Sara ate at the table they had claimed earlier. 

Many long tables along most of the wall at the far end of the building, was covered in free food and soft drinks. A few people were eating, others were drinking, talking and the rest were dancing.

"Thank you for bringing me here." Sara said as she stabbed some salad with her fork.

Grissom swallowed his bite of burger and smiled. "It was my pleasure."

She smiled and looked around the space where they were sitting. It was reasonably quiet while the majority of the music was a distance away.

"You want another beer?" She asked, watching him set his just now empty bottle back on the table.

"Sure." He nodded.

Sara got up and headed for the bar. She had to push through a loud group of what looked like cowboy wannabes. "Excuse me." She called politely and smiled as two men parted to let her though. "Thanks."

"No problem honey." One man in a bright white shirt and dark blue Levis jeans with a large cowboy hat, smiled. He followed her up to the bar a minute later. "Can I get these?" He offered.

Sara shook her head and smiled. "No thanks, I've got them."

"I'm Rob." He introduced himself as he ignored her decline and placed some money on the bar.

"And I'm able to pay for this myself." She said curtly, pushing the money aside and handing the lady the money, both exchanging knowing 'men!' smiles.

"At least let me know your name." He inquired, plastering on a huge smile.

"She's unavailable."

Sara grinned as she turned, beers in hand, to Grissom standing behind Rob. "Hey." She said cheerfully.

Grissom smiled and took the beers from her. "Hi. You done with making friends?" He asked teasingly, nodding his head towards the group.

Her grin widened. "Yep." She hooked her arm through his and turned her head back to the others. "Thanks for the offer though."

Rob tipped his hat at them before being pulled back into conversation with his group of friends.

~*~

"So, let's recap." Grissom said suddenly as he sat back in his seat and looked at her with a smirk. "Picked up on time. New and exciting place. Drinks, dinner, dancing. Rescuing… what else?" He teased.

Sara laughed softly and sipped her third beer. "Hmm, didn't know you were keeping tabs, but let's see." She thought for a moment, casting her eyes over the table, then up to his face. She took a breath before speaking. "Charming, gentleman, social, fun, funny, night in shining armor, and…" She looked him over and grinned. "Definitely hot in those jeans and that blue shirt."

He looked down at himself and blushed. "So?" He shrugged, looking back up.

Sara pursed herself and tilted her head, giving the impression of deep thought. "6 out of 10. She finally concluded.

Grissom laughed out loud. "What'd I miss?"

She shrugged and finished her beer. "Night's not over yet." She told him.

He nodded and smiled, watching her with his eyes as she went back to observing the others in the large room.

~*~

It was now closing in on 2.30am.

Sara stretched and stood up. Grissom grabbed his jacket and waited for her before moving for the exit.

"Ready to go?" He asked gently, sensing she was tired.

She smiled and nodded. "Yeah."

"Let's go then." He offered his arm and led the way out of the barn.

As they entered the night air, the cool breeze hit them and Sara shivered.

"Here." Grissom offered as he shrugged off his jacket and pushed it over her shoulders. "Better?"

"Thanks." Sara smiled, pulling the jacket closer and taking a deep breath against the softness. "Mhmm. Smells like you." She said dreamily.

"Should do." He teased, taking a step closer.

Slipping her arms into the sleeves, Sara blindly reached for his hand as it brushed against hers.

They walked down a row of cars and trucks before cutting through a line to reach Grissom's Tahoe. Grissom squeezed her hand before releasing it to search for his keys.

Padding his pockets, he looked up. "Uh." He smirked and moved to stand in front of her.

"Clear night." Sara said softly as he leaned forward to dig into his jacket pockets that were current occupied by her hands.

"A little chilly." He smiled, reaching his hand around hers to grasp his keys.

She shook her head. "No, it's lovely and warm right now." She found his eyes as they look at her.

"I'll remember that the next time." He kissed her lips, only a brush, before stepping back to press the keypad to unlock the car.

"So sure there's gonna be a next time?" She asked as he opened the passenger door.

Mulling this over for a moment, he shrugged. "Well, there's room for improvement."

~*~

The Tahoe pulled up to Sara's apartment at 3.46am.

Grissom got out and walked around to open the door. He escorted her up the path to her building and followed her up the stairs to the landing. As they reached her door, Grissom reached out and grasped her hand, turning her.

"Can I, do something that I've been wanting to do, all night?" He asked hesitantly.

Sara nodded and reached up to smooth out his collar.

Moving closer, he cupped her face in his hands. At first, his kiss was just a touch. His hands fell to her shoulders as his lips tasted hers.

Covering his hands on her shoulders, Sara pulled them down to hold them and pull him against her.

"When can I see you again?" He whispered against her mouth.

Laughing softly, she kissed his chin. "You see me every night."

"No." He droned. "Personally? When can I see you, outside work?" He looked into her eyes as he kissed her again; placing gentle light kisses against her skin as he spoke.

"Hmm, where we going?" She asked, returning the kiss before hugging him.

"Dinner, my place?" He closed his eyes, relishing in being allowed to hold her.

For very good reason, the offer of dinner at his place, made her stomach crap. She could picture him and Catherine entering through the front door and immediately grabbing at each other, not waiting to reach the bedroom.

She sighed heavily, though trying to hide the sudden pang of hurt in her heart. "I don't know Griss."

"Okay." He hugged her tighter, trying to reassure her of his intentions. "Your place. Here." He turned his head and kissed her neck, sending tiny shivers up her spine. "I'll take you anywhere you want." He told her.

Running her hands up his back, she stepped back. "Here, but just dinner." She informed him, making sure any ideas he was having, were dampened. She pulled her hands from him and turned to unlock her door.

Watching her push the door open, he couldn't help but press up against her back and hug her, kissing her neck and breathing in her scent as he whispered into her ear. "I love you." He let her turn around and he smiled at her. "See you tonight."

She nodded as she shrugged off his jacket and handed it to him. "Night."

~*~

Walking down the corridor, Grissom stopped at DNA to retrieve his DNA results and give Greg a lecture on his loud music. As he past the break room, he spotted Sara standing in front of the sink, presumably washing something.

He moved into the room, making sure it was only the two of them before getting close enough to touch his chest to her back. "Hi." He whispered into her ear.

"Hello." She whispered back, turning off the tap. "Where you been?" She asked, reaching to her left for the towel to dry her cup.

"Autopsy." He answered.

"Ah, anything interesting?"

He sighed. "Nothing."

"Well, I got something to tell that may interest you." She said as she dropped the towel and turned around, trapped between him and the counter. 

"Hmm, sounds interesting." He hummed, his eyes wandering from her brown eyes to her smiling mouth.

She pushed him back to get to the coffeepot. "It is." She poured coffee into her cup before continuing and turning to see him sit at the table. "You're taking a risk aren't you?" She asked, suddenly turning serious and the smile faded.

Grissom shrugged. "In what?" He stubbornly asked.

Sara sighed and sat down beside him. "You can't bring personal stuff to work. I'm not ready for this Grissom."

"Ready for what?" He leaned forward, closer. "You're the one who asked me out and said you knew what to do."

She sipped her coffee and shook her head. "That was before everything."

"You don't know what to do?" He asked.

"I do, but it's difficult. I can't just start dating you and tell everyone, not after everyone was so happy you and Catherine together." She said with bitterness, but sadly.

"Hey," He called softly, trying to break through her dark thoughts. "That's gone now."

Sara nearly slammed her cup down on the table, just about spilling her coffee. She leaned forward and stared at him. "That was only 4 months ago Grissom. You can't honestly think that this won't be frowned at? I'd be accused of manipulating you and talked about constantly. I don't want that."

"I don't either, but I want you and I want the others to know that I love you." He stressed, taking her hand and squeezing it. "I don't care if they think I'm just going through some kind of crisis, because I know I'm not and so do you," He looked into her eyes. "Don't you?" He asked, slightly worried.

She nodded and her frown softened into a slight smile. "I just don't want to rush things and have it fall apart."

"It won't. I won't let it happen." He promised.

Sara gave him a shy smile and slowly pulled her hand from his. "Don't make promises you might not be able to keep."

He grinned and sat back, scooping up her coffee. "I'm promising to keep my promise."

"We'll see." She told him, catching his eye before taking her cup from him and finishing her coffee.

~*~

Warrick, Nick and Grissom worked a double homicide while Sara and Brass investigated a robbery gone wrong.

"Hey, Griss?" Warrick looked at his boss. "How you been man?"

Grissom stood up and turned to his colleague and friend. "Good, why'd you ask?"

Warrick shrugged. "No reason, just been a rough a few months for you, that's all."

"Oh," Grissom smirked. "I'm good, no, great, actually." He nodded and went back to his work.

Warrick didn't seem convinced and watched on worriedly as his boss worked.

~*~

Brass stopped beside Sara and sighed. "If it was an inside job, we've run out of suspects."

Sara nodded. "I know." She looked off to the side and spotted something in the mudded grass. "Though, something may have just popped up."

"What you got?" Brass asked as he crouched down next to her.

"Some really good footprints and two cigarette butts."

Looking around, Brass cheered up a little. "That could mean that this was premeditated."

"Yup. Guy waits outside before going in and doing what he came to do."

"Was that the robbery or the murder?" Brass asked.

"We'll soon find that out." Sara stood. She bagged the new evidence and cast the footprints.

~*~

"It's one thing to stand so close to me in the break room, but to kiss me in your office is too much. Anyone could walk in." Sara protested, holding out her hand at arms length to keep him away from her.

"Nick and Warrick are processing evidence-"

"So should we now you mention it. And that was the reason I'm here in the first place." She interrupted.

Grissom tilted his head and smirked. "Really, so you weren't meaning to participate in that kiss just now?"

Sara huffed and gave his chest a quick shove, but broke out into a smile and a giggle. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were serious about this dating and loving, thing."

Waiting for her to stop giggling, he sighed. "You still don't believe me?"

She tampered her laughter and pulled on a frown. "It's hard to forget what you did. It's hard to forget what I did. This won't happen over night Gil, you have to be patient."

"I've been patient and I'll continue to be patient until you believe in me and trust me again." He swore, talking her hand to hold it.

"Are we still on for tonight?" She asked.

"I wouldn't cancel on you, well, not within reason, say a case, but yup, I'm game." He teased.

Closing the distance between them, she wrapped her arms around his neck and gazed into his eyes. "So, if you didn't turn up, it'd be because of a case, work?" She asked curiously.

He nodded. "But I'd ring." He told her. "But, if I get called during dinner, then it's you, not work."

Seeing the sincerity in his eyes, Sara kissed him lightly once, then twice, before finally breaking the tension with a passionate, first, proper kiss.

Grissom moaned into her mouth as he pulled her tightly against him. "God, I love you more than anything."

"Hmm, I love me too." She giggled.

A moment later, the door to Grissom's office opened and standing in the light was a tall slim figure with a very angry and surprised look on their face. "Am I interrupting something?"

****

TBC


	8. Chapter Eight: Hunt

****

Chapter Eight: Hunt

Grissom looked up at the intruder. "Yes." He snapped.

"Good."

Sara pulled her arms from around Grissom's neck and self consciously straightened her clothing.

"I got a lead on our case."

Grissom nodded and waved the intruder out of the office. "Oh," He stopped them. "I trust you keep this quiet Warrick."

The tall dark young man nodded and glanced briefly towards Sara. "Greg's looking for you Sar." He informed her in a surprisingly soft and gentle voice.

"Thanks Warrick." She turned to him before smiling.

Grissom waited for Warrick to close the door. "I told you everything would be alright." He whispered to her as he watched her frown at her hands. Taking them in his, he sighed. "Sara, I'm not going to let the team decide who I date."

"I'm not worried about you, I'm worried about me." She told him seriously, pulling her hands from his, but raised one to touch his slightly scruffy beard. "If you are serious, then you'll slow this down."

"Let's get back to work." He suggested, leaning into her palm as his hand covered hers. "We can talk more over dinner tonight."

"Remember the wine." She reminded him with a small smile.

Grissom chuckled. "Come on, Greg's waiting for you."

Sara nodded and turned to the door. "Guess you should find Warrick and catch up on that lead."

~*~

"Vega got some hits from a neighbour." Nick informed Grissom as he walked into the AV lab.

"Good," Grissom adjusted his glasses and looked towards the image on the wall screen. "What's with the home movie?"

"Oh, neighbour was out filming night wildlife in his back garden." Warrick explained. He continued when his boss just looked at him. "Some film course at LVU."

~*~

Greg swung his seat around to check the DNA replicating machine. When Sara entered through the slightly closed door, she could hear him humming to some kind of tune. Though she couldn't for the life of her think what song it was from.

"Hey Greggo." She said cheerfully.

"Hey Sara." Greg smiled, shifting from the DNA machine to pick some papers up from his outbox tray. "Got your DNA back on those butts you gave me." He informed her as he flicked his wrists to offer her the reports.

Sara carefully read through the information and a smile appeared. "This is exactly what I needed."

Greg's smile grew. "I cracked the case?" He asked eagerly.

"Maybe, I'll let you know." She offered, turning to head off and find Brass.

~*~

He stood watching her as she poured wine into two glasses. His position in the kitchen entryway gave him a great view of her movements as she pottered around finishing putting pots away. He'd offered to help, but he was told to stay where he was.

"Here, let me do that." He ventured for the fourth time as she failed to reach the top of the cupboard to store the large pan she'd used to boil the pasta.

Moving up behind her, he cradled her hip with one hand while pushing the pan onto the cupboard with ease. When he had completed that task, his hand came to rest on her hip with the other. His chest was lightly touching her back with each breath he took.

She picked up a glass of wine and sipped it as she looked into the reflection of the glass door cupboard, watching him. Her eyes closed when his mouth made contact with her neck. Turning in his grasp, she placed her free hand in the centre of his chest and slowly pushed him back until he took a step.

He smiled and covered her hand, raising it to his lips to kiss. "What's for dessert?" He asked seductively.

"Not this." She told him, pulling her hand from him to exit the kitchen area and enter the living room.

"Sara." He called as he retrieved his glass of wine.

Sitting down, she turned her head to look at him as he walked towards her.

"If Catherine came back, what would you do?"

Startled by the question, Grissom sat down on the couch beside her.

"Would you go back to her?" Sara asked.

"She left me." He reminded her, taking a long swallow of his wine.

Still feeling stuck in the middle, Sara knew she was biding time before the ugliness of reality hit and everything returned back to the way it was 4 months prior. She needed answers.

"Would you go back to her?" She asked again, staring at him for a long time, waiting for him to answer.

He sighed quietly and looked into his glass. "I'd like to think that I had a choice-"

"That's why I'm asking Grissom. You get what you want which ever way you choose, but I want to know, now, who you'd choose?" Sara asked quietly, but quickly.

"I wouldn't just up and leave."

"But I don't know that." She said softly.

Grissom looked at her then. "I've told you I wouldn't do that. I told you I know what I want." His voice was gentle, but there was an edge to his words.

Leaning forward, she pushed her glass onto the coffee table. "I would like to think you'd stay with me." Sara moved to the edge of the couch. "But I have no say in this. It's your life and you can live it how you like."

He watched her stand and occupy herself with something on the breakfast bar. "You're my life Sara-"

"It's just hard to understand why." She told him, turning to lean back against the bar. "One minute you are teasing and flirting with me, the next you are snappy and hurtful. I can't tell anymore if you're going to be nice to me from one day to the next."

"I-" Grissom shook his head and sat forward to cradle his wine glass in his hands, his elbows resting on his knees.

"Since the explosion at the lab, I've felt like a second wheel. Like I didn't belong there anymore. I tried to change that, but I got pushed back." She shrugged and focused on her shoes. "You showed me you cared that day. You came over to me on the sidewalk and helped me, but the minute I tried to thank you or ask for a moment of your time, you made excuses."

"I was busy Sara. It was a hectic day." He told her.

Nodding, Sara pushed off the bar and moved to sit on the coffee table, just slightly off to his side. "And I needed someone to talk too."

"All those injured in the accident where given Dr Philips number-" He rattled off.

"No." She sighed. "I needed a friend to talk too, not some stranger Grissom. I needed my friend."

Thinking of something to clear the air, something to close off this area of discussion, Grissom placed his glass beside hers and reached for her hands. Moving to the edge of the couch, he looked up into her eyes. "I'm sorry about then. I can't go back and change it, but I'm sorry. I had things," He tried to think of the words, but they didn't come easily. "Things that were going on in my life at that time. I was being pressured into making a decision on my surgery."

"I want to talk about that another time." Sara interrupted, taking the chance to point out that she wants to talk about his hearing another time.

Grissom nodded and pulled her hands to his face, holding them against his cheeks. "I don't want to argue with you about the past."

"I still want an answer." She pressed quickly. "Will you go back?" Waiting for his answer, her hands turned in his to touch his face, her fingers lightly playing with the short beard hairs on his cheeks.

"It's not a difficult question Sara, it's just-"

"You don't want to answer?" She asked quietly.

"I don't want to hurt you." He corrected.

"You're hurting me by not giving me an answer." She shot back.

Grissom groaned and closed his eyes to nuzzle into her hands. "You're making this into an argument."

Sara leaned forward and brushed her lips across his forehead. "Deep down, I want to believe you, but I can't. If I make this easy, I'm going to regret it for the rest of my life." She sighed and looked into his eyes as they opened.

"Arguing is not an answer."

"I know that." She smiled. "I just don't want you to get away Scott free without at least one interrogation tonight."

"I'd choose you, Sara. I'd choose you." He breathed against her lips just as his claimed hers, stealing her reply.

Sliding onto his knees, he pushed between her thighs to press against her. His lips seared her skin as they left the confines of her mouth to explore her neck.

After returning to his mouth a few times, Sara pulled back, took a deep breath and tried to slow her heart rate before opening her eyes to catch the same reaction in the man kneeling before her.

"I can only do this if you believe me when I say I love you and when I say that I'd choose you if Cath ever came back." He breathed heavily, his eyes dark as they gazed into hers. "Years of trying to get over this feeling I have inside whenever I think about you, doubles when I see you. I can't forget the feel of you now I've made that step to make things right. You have to believe me."

Staring into his eyes, she could see so much emotion and she didn't know if it scared her of excited her. Knowing he was showing her how he felt made her feel how much he was willing to fight for her belief in him and how much he loved her.

"I believe you." She whispered, running the back of her fingers down the side of his face. "But only if you keep being open with me. I can't take it when you close off to me. I need to know what you're thinking and feeling."

"I'm feeling very scared Sara." He confessed to both their surprise and it light up both their eyes.

Her breathing hitched as she watched his blue eyes glisten slightly. "I'm scared too." She smiled. "As long as we both know, then we can be here for each other."

Grissom shifted to stand up, pulling Sara with him. "I should go."

She nodded and cupped his cheek. "I may believe you, but it's still going to be difficult for me at work. Now Warrick knows, I can't imagine how the other's are going to react once the word gets around."

"Warrick can keep quiet." He reassured her. "But I'm here for good if word does get out."

Walking him to the door, Sara picked up his jacket and lightly held it to her chest as he opened the door and moved to stand on the landing. When he turned to her, he saw her holding his jacket against her. Smiling, he reached for his it and slipped it on. "Thank you for dinner."

Sara smiled and straightened out his collar. "Give me a ring when you wake up. We can maybe do something before work?" She asked, concentrating on his buttoned shirt and pressed her hand against his heart.

~*~

"Well, I can't drive back now." Grissom laughed as the tow truck drove off with his Tahoe.

Sara giggled and leaned against the pay meter. "It's not working."

"I guessed that Sherlock." He teased.

She giggled again and nearly toppled over in hysterics.

"Oh, you think this is funny?" He joked, reaching for her playfully.

"Definitely." She giggled.

Grissom chuckled and pulled her into his side as they started walking along the sidewalk. "We can get a cab."

"Or, we could walk. It's only a few blocks." She suggested.

"Then a few more blocks." He added.

Sara shrugged and slipped her arm around his waist, pressing her hand against his shirt to feel his heated skin beneath.

"We can get ice cream." She smiled, spotting an ice cream parlour a few yards in front of them.

"Mhmmm, sounds nice."

Each took up their earlier positions and held onto each other while holding their ice creams. Walking further past many shops and cafes, the sun quickly melted their ice creams and soon the stickiness was dripping down Grissom's chin.

Sara laughed and tried to wipe the drop that he couldn't reach with his tongue. With her hands full, she stopped and liked the drop with her own tongue.

Grissom smiled and gave her a quick kiss, lingering a little longer before returning to making their way back to Grissom's townhouse.

"I like your beard." She complimented suddenly.

He chuckled and looked down at her. "I thought it was scratchy."

She shook her head. "Nope, I like how it feels." She leaned her head against this shoulder before sighing. "It tickles."

"I'll remember that the next time I kiss you."

~*~

Reaching the corner to Grissom's street, they walked slowly towards his home. "So, how am I getting home?" Sara asked.

"Uh," He laughed. "I didn't think about that."

"I can get a cab." She offered.

Grissom nodded and agreed. "You could, or you can stay and wait for me to get my car back."

Thinking this over, she lightly moved her hand in slow circles on his chest. His house came into view and the choice was made for her. "I can stay."

"I think a cool drink is in order after that long walk."

"Sounds good." She smiled at him as they turned up his drive and headed towards his front door.

When they were inside and making small talk over ice tea, both were keeping close to each other, causing them to bump several times. The closeness made them feel safe and it was becoming more and more comfortable being so close to each other.

Sara finished her drink and turned on her stool to watch Grissom put a CD into his player. Getting up, she walked towards him to look over his shoulder at what he was doing.

"Country music?" She asked.

****

TBC


	9. Chapter Nine: Discovered

****

Chapter Nine: Discovered

Grissom smiled and nodded as he pushed play. "Thought we could replay that night at the barn." He turned and took Sara into his arms. "Though, we could just get straight to the point."

She gazed into his eyes. "Which point would that be?"

"The point of me kissing you." He murmured close to her lips.

"You're very confidant Dr Grissom." She teased as she stepped away from him.

Grasping her hand, he walked a few steps into the open space of his living room before turning her and twirling her under his arm.

"I'm not so confidant Sara." He told her as the music filled the room.

She grasped onto his shirt and pulled him into a much intensified kiss. Gasping for breath, she pushed him away and started to slowly unbutton her shirt.

Grissom reached up to his own buttons and started pulling them free as he stepped up against her. He claimed her mouth with his in a heated kiss before abandoning his shirt and pulling her against him.

Sara turned her hands between them and finished unbuttoning his shirt. Sliding her hands from his stomach around to his back, she pulled his shirt from his pants, all the while returning the slow kisses that she was receiving.

~*~

"How many CD's did you put in?" She asked.

"Hmm, just two." He replied.

Snuggling up closer to his warm body, she sighed. "I haven't heard this one."

Chuckling softly into her ear, he pressed a kiss to her temple. "I think you were otherwise occupied at the time, honey."

"Mhmm."

Listening to the music filling the living room, hallway and bedroom, they snuggled and closed their eyes, savouring the memories and sensations they had just shared.

As the song ended, Sara lightly pushed her body on his and towered over him with her hands coming down to rest either side of his head.

Grissom smirked and ran his hands up the back of her bare thighs to rest on her hips.

"You won't pressure me, will you?" She asked suddenly, her face as serious as if she were talking about a case.

His smirk faded and his eyes wrinkled as he frowned. "Have I gone too far?" He asked.

She shook her head and lowered herself onto her forearms so she was closer to him and her fingers could play with his hair. "I mean, this was inevitable." She told him. "I wanted to and you wanted to, but-" She sighed and pressed her forehead to his. "We're still working towards this stage, aren't we?" She asked, opened her eyes to stare into his with many questions reflecting in her dark brown eyes.

He breathed out slowly and hummed and affirmative as his arms snaked around her waist to hold her to him. "I know what you're saying Sara. But I think we both know that we've past our hold ups after this."

She looked down at him for a long time before sighing into his kiss as he pushed up his chin.

Hooking his leg over hers, he gently turned them until he was laying over her body, resting against her and relaxing into their kiss.

Before the moment could escalate, the music from the stereo abruptly stopped in the middle of the song.

Grissom's lips pulled back from Sara's throat to cast his eyes towards the door.

The sound of the refrigerator opening and closing settled a heavy slab of cold ice into both their stomachs.

Slipping quietly from the bed, he opened his wardrobe and reached for his old baseball bat. He turned to Sara as she was pulling on his shirt and her pants. "Stay here honey, ok, don't move." He whispered, cupping her cheek to look into her eyes, relaying his words tenfold with his intense blue orbs.

Pulling on his boxers that were sitting by the open door, he grasped the bat in his right hand. He stepped into the hallway and continued to move slowly towards the living room.

His eyes scanned the motionless room with investigator eyes and looked over at the stereo to see that the power had been turned off. Checking to make sure that it wasn't a power cut, he dropped his watchful eyes to his VCR to check the time. If the power had turned off, then his clock would have been reset. By the looks of it, it was still set and blinking away.

Brandishing his bat once more, he moved through the living room to the kitchen where the familiar sound of his coffee pot was chugging as fresh coffee was being brewed.

Finding his voice, he round the column that was blinding his view of the kitchen. "Who's there?" He made it around the column and raised his bat slightly to give him a good swing if he needed it. "What are you doing in my house?" He called again, this time more sternly as he spotted a figure standing by the coffee pot.

As the figure turned, he could make out white suit like pants with creamy heeled shoes. A light blouse and a matching white suit like jacket. When he reached the face of the person standing in his kitchen, his heart stopped and his right hand, holding the baseball bat, lowered quickly.

"Catherine."

~*~

"Hello Gil." The silky voice greeted with a warm smile following. "Sorry about the intrusion, but I knocked. Guess you were in the shower huh?" She asked, spying his wet hair and slightly glistening body.

Grissom stood there a moment, before shaking his head and looking at himself. He ran his left hand through his wet curls before his eyes snapped up to meet hers. "What are you doing here and how the hell did you get in?" He demanded.

Catherine smiled and walked towards him. "I have a key, remember?" She watched his face as she got closer and before she got close enough, she smelt the distinct odour of musk about him. Her smile disappeared. "What's going on?" She demanded her own question.

Grissom furrowed his brow and shook his head. "I want you to leave. You're trespassing on my property."

Ignoring him, she pushed past and marched across the living room. "Who the hell?-What the?" Her words melded into one as her anger boiled and her curiosity heightened.

Following behind her, he snagged her arm and turned her to him so he could block her way to his room. "Answer the question Cath, what are you doing here?"

Snatching her arm from him, she glared. "I'm moving back."

Shaking his head, he scratched at his beard. "What?" He asked confusedly.

"I said I'm moving back to Vegas. I'll be back at work tomorrow night." She informed him with a menacing glare as she glanced towards his open room door.

"You'll have no job." He told her angrily.

Catherine stopped her observation of the bedroom doorway and looked at him. "What do you mean I'll have no job?"

"Exactly what I said. Cavallo won't re-employ someone who quit. You'll have a hard time talking your way back Catherine, so just hold your breath and go back to where ever you came from."

She stared at him with her mouth hanging open in shock.

"I don't want to ever see you again." He spat out and turned away from her.

"Guess you found some slut to take my place huh!?" She taunted.

Grissom slowly turned when he reached his bedroom door. "Say all you want Catherine; you don't know anything about me."

She gurgled with haunting laughter as she faked wiping her eyes. "My sweet Gil, I'm the only one who knows you." She pinned him with her angry eyes. "In and outside the bedroom, my dear. So don't let your guard down, I'll get my job back, you watch me."

Casting his eyes to his side, he held out his hand to Sara. She hesitantly approached him and took his hand.

Catherine watched as the mystery woman stepped into view and straight into Grissom's embrace. She was stricken with surprise. "Sara?" She gasped.

"Hey Catherine." Sara sighed sadly as she avoided the blonde's surprised face.

Taking in the brunettes dishevelled appearance, the creased jeans, bare feet, Grissom's shirt and wild hair; she could clearly see what had been happening here. Taking all this on board, she straightened her shoulders and put on a brave face. "Well, I hope you're happy." She told Grissom. "But remember, I'll be back at work in no time."

"Goodbye Catherine." He pointed to his front door, signalling the end of this uninvited visit.

~*~

Sara pulled the blanket that was wrapped around her, tighter. She watched as Grissom made them some lunch. They hadn't spoken since Catherine had left them alone. It was starting to worry Sara more than anything.

What if he was thinking that it was over? What was she going to do if he decided they couldn't continue seeing each other? She knew she would be heartbroken for ever if anything happened now. She had just started to believe the things he was telling her, sharing with her. Now she was scared he was going to close off to her and forget what had happened between them.

Her heart was pounding in her chest as she shifted on the couch to bury herself deeper into the blanket. She was cold and she knew it was the dread lying in the pit of her stomach.

"Here." He offered her a hot cup of coffee before sitting down on his coffee table.

She took the cup and slowly sipped it, casting her eyes ahead of her or into her cup.

"You ok?" He asked.

Not sure what to say, she shrugged and shook her head.

Grissom moved to sit on the couch, close to her so he could cover her hands that were holding her coffee cup. He looked into her saddened eyes. "What are you thinking?"

Sara sighed and closed her eyes briefly. "Griss," She turned her head to look at him. "I can't stop thinking about what you're going to do now." She told him honestly, tears springing to her eyes.

"Hey," He said soothingly, taking her cup away from her hands to move closer. She watched his hand absently put her cup on the table as he gathered her into his arms. "I'm not going to leave you. I've already told you this Sara, and I promised you."

She clutched to his body hungrily. "I don't want you to leave." She whispered into his chest.

"I'm not going anywhere. We're stuck with each other honey, I promise you that. After everything we've been through, I'm not going to walk away." He pulled back to hold her face in his hands. "I love you."

Sara gave him a watery smile and closed her eyes when he pulled her against him. If he was being honest with her, then he was very good at lying. But on the other hand, he could mean everything he was saying and she so wanted to listen to that side of her conflicted brain. And for once, she did.

"I'm hungry." She sighed, pushing her face into his neck before kissing her way up his jaw to his ear, sucking lightly on the lobe. "We need to keep our energy levels up." She whispered seductively, causing him to shiver delightfully and groan.

~*~

"They're late." He murmured once again as he checked his watch. The towing service had obviously given no indication when they would drop off his Tahoe, but this was taking the piss.

"We did leave it a bit late Gil."

He turned at the sound of her voice to see her standing in the hallway in only his shirt. He sighed with a smile on his face as he walked towards her.

"I called nearly two hours ago." He mock whined, pushing open the shirt to slip his hands along her soft skin. His hands explored already known territory as his body responded to the warmth and sensations of being close to her partially naked body.

Before his mouth to claim hers, loud knocking on his door interrupted them. "Great!" He groaned, pulling his hands back as Sara wrapped the shirt around her with a teasing smile.

"I'll get dressed." She told him.

"Right." He sighed, watching her walk away. He turned towards the front door and sighed again.

~*~

Sara walked up to her apartment with Grissom in tow. She reached her door when Yuki called up from the courtyard.

"Hey Yuki!" Sara called back.

"Good to see you Mr Grissom." Yuki smiled, raising her sunglasses to get a better look at the two of them. "Your phone has been ring for the past hour sweetie, you might want to check the machine." She suggested, having listened to the ringing on and off for a while.

Sara nodded. "Thanks Yuki. Talk to you tomorrow." She turned to her door and opened it, but before she could remove her key, Grissom had wrapped his arm around her waist. She looked back at him over her shoulder with a wide smile. "Hey, something wrong?"

He shook his head. "Everything's perfect."

She smiled widely at him. "Let me change and I'll meet you at work."

Returning her smile, he shook his head. "Let's go in together." He suggested, kissing the back of her neck. "No doubt Catherine has spread the news."

Sara's smile vanished. They entered her apartment. Grissom removed her keys from the lock before following. "She's going to play the innocent in this, isn't she?"

He nodded. "Probably. She's manipulative, but she's also got this side that is sweet enough to get you close, and then go in for the kill."

Watching him from across the room, she could see the sadness in his eyes. "She really used you, didn't she?"

"I guess she does know me." He said softly, not meeting her eyes.

Sara held out her hand to him and beckoned him closer. When he was closer enough, she wrapped her arms around him, lightly rubbing his back comfortingly. "She knew you." Sara whispered. "But I know for a fact that you've changed. I know you better now."

"I only want you to know me Sara."

"I hope I can make you happy and not be like Catherine." She said softly.

Grissom brushed his spiky beard against her cheek and chuckled. "You make me happy, more than anything, when you are near me. I'm beyond happy when you're with me. You could be nothing like Catherine."

"Stop that!" She giggled when his beard tickled her and his hands made their way under her jacket to tease and tickle her. "Gil!" She squealed, laughing when he lifted her up. "We've got to go to work!"

"Hmm, maybe we can continue this later." He chuckled long and happily as she planted kisses all over his face.

"Shower and change in 15 minutes, relax." She told him, pushing away form his strong arms.

~*~

Reaching the front door, Grissom stopped. "You forgot to check your messages."

Sara turned to the machine to see the red light and the single digit number that flashed at her. "Suppose I should check." She sighed.

__

'You have eight messages.'

****

'Don't fall for his charm Sara, you're smarter than that.'

'He's using you, just like he used me.'

'Stop fooling yourself honey, you haven't got a chance.'

'I know what you're doing. You can't pull the wool over my eyes like you can his.'

'You're only with him for a promotion.'

'I'm going to make sure you are fired Sara. I'll have you gone within the week.' 

'Sleeping with the boss gets you no where.'

'This isn't personal Sara.'

Grissom stared at the speakers on the answer machine as it beeped.

'There are no more messages.'

"That can be construed as a threat Sara." He informed her.

She turned to him slowly. "Are you willing to place your career, and mine, on the line to find out Griss?" She shook her head. "I'm not."

****

TBC


	10. Chapter Ten: Defeated

****

Chapter Ten: Defeated

Pulling the door closed, Sara listened for the lock to click before turning and following Grissom along the landing to the stairs. As they reached the parking lot, Sara hesitated when he continued to his car.

Grissom turned just as he unlocked his door. "Sara?" He asked, seeing her standing on the path in front of her own car.

She shook her head and sighed. "I don't think we should ride together tonight."

His eyes lingered on her car for a moment. "Why?"

Sara looked at him. "Catherine." She almost spat, suddenly tense that he had forgotten so quickly.

"Sara," He said her name to get her attention, but when he didn't get it, he walked towards her. "It's jealousy. Nothing more."

"Yeah, and she's going to ruin our careers because of it." She listened to the silence for a moment before turning to him and placing her hand on his chest, right over his heart. "Talk to her, you need to talk." She pressed, trying to rid the bad feeling in her stomach.

Grissom stared into her dark brown eyes and saw the worry in them. "If you think it'll help." He asked in a soft voice.

She nodded and dropped her eyes from his to stare at her hand.

~*~

Grissom handed out assignments with a distracted mind. He couldn't stop from looking up and down the corridors to see if Catherine was lurking at the corners. It was starting to get on his nerves.

Half way through shift, he was called into the field to investigate a suspicious phone call made to the police. Nick and Warrick were working a DB near Henderson and Sara was solo at the Monaco with a suicide. It was a fairly quiet night. Everyone was waiting on results for additional cases they were working on, but the crime rate of Vegas wasn't going to slow down to please the criminalists tonight.

Arriving back from her crime scene, Sara dropped her single piece of evidence off with Greg and proceeded to the break room to write up her report.

"You're back early." Grissom greeted as he entered the room shortly after her.

"Nothing much to process either. Just some blood, most likely the vics."

He nodded and headed to the fridge. "Hey, you think Warrick would mind if I ate his sandwich?"

Sara looked up from her paperwork and shrugged. "You want to pass me some water?"

Reaching for the water, he pulled out two bottles and grabbed Warrick's chicken sandwich. "I'll buy him a sub at break." He offered as he sat down and stuck into his claimed lunch.

"You need any help with your case? What was it again?" She asked as she signed her name and closed the file. Picking up the bottle of water, she unscrewed the cap.

"Suspicious circs." He said around a mouthful. Swallowing, he went into more detail. "Brass got a call from the west side of the Strip. Officer on duty at a parking garage got a mystery call. When he took a look around, he saw some legs sticking out from under a car. When Brass got there, he noticed a bullet hole in the guys head."

Sara winced for good measure. "Ran over and shot?"

Grissom nodded and took another bit of his sandwich. "Looks like it."

"Ouch." She shook her head and sighed. After a few minutes, she looked up at him and tilted her head slightly to the side. "Have you seen her yet?"

Wiping his mouth, he sighed. "Not yet, but I'm sure she'll be here before shifts over."

Nodding, she swallowed some of her water.

By the end of shift, Warrick and Nick were sitting on the couch in the break room, playing on their game console. Sara was relaxing with a book in the single armchair opposite them. Grissom was working on his current case paperwork at the table.

"Nothing changes huh?" Came an amused chuckle.

Warrick and Nick immediately dropped what they were doing to rush to the door and hug the newcomer.

"Cath! What you doing here?" Warrick hugged her.

"You left without a word!" Nick waited his turn.

Grissom turned in his seat to look at the display. He glanced at Sara sitting in the corner. She was watching them too.

After the 'hellos' and 'how are yous' came and went, the boys stepped back to let her pass into the room. Nick was the first to say something after a lengthily silence.

"Look Griss, Catherine's back." Nick looked between the too with a happy grin.

"I know Nicky." Grissom stood and faced Catherine. "Guys, could you leave us." It was more of a command than a question.

Warrick and Nick nodded and headed for the locker room to gather up their coats. Sara slipped on her jacket that was lying on the back of the chair before walking out of the room and straight for the exit.

~*~

Shutting the door quietly, he turned. "Ok, say what you've got to say and leave."

Catherine sat down in the chair he was sitting in moments ago. "Funny how things go." She said wistfully. "I go away and nothing changes." She smiled up at him. "You'll always be doing paperwork."

"It's part of the job." He said tolerably.

"And on the other hand," She continued. "Something's do change." Her eyes darkened and narrowed. "Good thing we weren't married huh? You'd have really had a problem then, right?"

"That was a fleeting moment Catherine, which is long gone."

"Yeah, still, you talk about marriage to a girl; she might think it's a serious commitment. Something you're no good at, evidently." She mocked.

Grissom kept his face as expressionless as possible and his voice as steady as a rock. "You can talk."

Raising her eyebrows, she smiled sweetly. "You noticed that huh?"

"How couldn't I?" He asked. "Running off without a word. You used me to get those charges dropped from Sam Braun."

"Don't be silly Gil. I wouldn't go that low." She laughed.

Stepping forward, he shrugged. "How would the DA and the Sheriff like it if they knew that you pushed buttons to get a murderer off the hook? I know the Director wouldn't like it. No one in the world would employ you after that gets out."

"Well, good thing you aren't going to tell anyone. You're not that kind of man Gil, face it. Would you really put yourself in it to get back at me?"

He stepped back again. "Won't know will we. But the point of fact is that you aren't going to get your job back no matter what you do or how much you threaten Sara." He watched her eyes widen slightly. "Oh, you didn't think I'd hear it? Those alone will keep you from working here Catherine. You should have thought of a better way to intimidate than leaving evidence a mile long to implicate you."

A sense of smugness filled him and his amusement wasn't absent from his eyes when he looked at her. "I'd think about what you're going to do, because if you do anything to hurt Sara, you'll be answering to me and a work of shit. Not to mention a few rumours for good measure to some of my colleagues to stunt your job searching." A smirk appeared, but it easily slipped into a smile.

"Good to see you though." He finished.

Catherine sighed. "Fine. Enough of the macho bull."

Grissom sat down at the table. "Why did you come back?"

"Missed everyone. I can miss my friends Gil."

He nodded. "Yeah, but what about me? You can't just up and leave without a word, then turn up out of the blue. You scared the crap out of me and Sara this morning."

"I didn't expect to be breaking up a two man party Grissom." She snapped.

Sighing heavily, he rubbed his forehead. "Well, to stop that from happening again," He held out his hand. "I'd like my key back."

She reached into her purse and handed it over. "I thought you weren't interested in Sara anymore. Isn't that why you were with me in the first place, to warn her off?"

Grissom nodded. "Partly." He looked at her as he pushed the spare key into his pants pocket. "I do love you Cath, but… not like that anymore. I'm not entirely sure if I ever really did."

"I can relate I suppose." She admitted.

"I didn't need to think about that, but yes, I knew you went off with that guy you met a while back."

Catherine leaned back and looked around the room. "So, what is going on between you two? You work things out or what?"

"It wasn't easy and it's not going to be. I've been really hurtful and mean to Sara since me and you started seeing each other. She's not to blame here Cath; she's the victim out of all this. I was just too selfish to see it."

"Well, something must have gone right if you two ended up in bed." She prodded.

He shook his head sadly. "You can call that what you want. Releasing pent up emotions, but underneath it all, and before you barged in, it was a lot more."

Looking guilty and saddened by the fact that she was making things worse than they should be, she sighed and stood. "I came back to work and see my friends."

Grissom nodded. "Sadly, I was telling the truth about your job here Catherine. You quit. That's not a good reference on your CV."

Nodding in understanding, she headed for the door.

"Cath," He called. When she turned to him, he continued. "You need to apologise to Sara. She's scared. Those things you said were frightening. She's afraid we'll both lose our jobs over this."

"Can you do it for me?" She asked. "I think it's best if I just head back and stay with my mom for a while longer. Lindsey loves it up there anyway."

Thinking that it might be best, he agreed. "Don't be a stranger Cath. We all love you, I love you, but I'm going to do well by Sara. Just like I should have done years ago."

Walking back towards him, she cupped his cheek and smiled down at him. "Love you too." She placed a light kiss on his lips before leaving him sitting alone in the break room.

~*~

Yuki smiled as Sara leaned against her. "It's ok sweetie. Things work out in the end."

"I hope so." Sara sighed.

Hugging her, Yuki looked up to see Grissom standing at the front of the courtyard. "I think everything's going to be just fine." She whispered.

Sara looked up before turning to see what Yuki was looking at. Yuki got up and left them alone. Sara stayed seated on the bench, waiting for him to sit down.

"Hey." He smiled, sitting beside her.

"Guess you talked to Catherine then?" She asked, looking down at her feet.

"Sure." He said eagerly. "Few home truths, threats, the usual." He took her hand and twined their fingers. "She's going back to her mothers. She won't say anything, and she says to say sorry about the messages. She was upset and angry."

"You wouldn't have noticed with the way she was saying, 'it's nothing personal'" Sara intoned sarcastically.

He chuckled and pulled her into his side to hold her. His arm circled her shoulders. "Everything will be ok Sara. Just give it time."

"Time." She sighed. "I've been waiting nearly 4 years. I'm nearly 35. I've got no life. A family I rarely see. A hectic time demanding job. A boyfriend who's driving me crazy and his ex who's threatening to ruin me. Seems to me that time is running out."

"I wouldn't say that honey." He soothed. "Half that stuff is irrelevant now any ways."

"Don't see my family as much as I'd like though." She said sadly.

Grissom held her close. "I think I've got plenty of vacation days saved. I know you have." He chuckled. "We can go see them if you'd like."

Sara pulled away and stared at him. "You want to meet my parents?"

He nodded as he pushed errant hairs out of her eyes. "Well, you'll want to meet my mother at some stage, right?"

She nodded slowly. "I'd like that." She smiled and settled back against him. "What about my crazy boyfriend?" She asked.

"Hmmm, I'll have to think about that, but I'm sure we can solve the no life aspect at the same time, don't you think?"

"I'm not getting any younger either." She laughed softly.

Grissom chuckled. "I'm sure that's my line, but I'm positive we can sort something out. At this moment, I want to spend all my free time with you. Get that life you want so much."

"Let's go back to your friend's barn sometime. That was fun." She sighed lightly, slipping her arm around his waist. "I kinda like it when you're around me." She teased.

He chuckled again and kissed her head. "That's good to know."

Sara pushed her head onto his shoulder and kissed his jaw. "I'm tired. Let's go upstairs and relax."

"Would this relaxing involve dancing?" He asked as they stood up.

"We'll, I'm sure I've got a country CD somewhere about the place."

"Hmm, I've got breakfast in the car. I'll be up in a minute." He watched her climb the steps before he turned and headed for his car to get the bag of food he had picked up from the store.

As he entered the apartment, he could hear country music playing. He placed the bag on the kitchen counter and put the cold items in the fridge. "Sara?" He called before heading towards the bedroom.

"I'm in the shower!" She shouted.

Standing by the bed, he eased the buttons loose on his shirt. "You hungry?" He asked as he unbuckled his belt.

"No!"

Kicking off his shoes, he pulled his pants and socks off, leaving him sitting on the bed in his undershirt and boxers.

Sara walked into the bedroom wearing a large white towel. She smiled at him as she towel dried her hair with a smaller towel.

Grissom reached out for her and pulled her forward between his knees. "I brought salad and sandwiches for later." He told her as his hands ran down the back of her legs.

Dropping the small towel, she grasped his shoulders and leaned down to kiss his forehead. "Are you willing to do what it takes to be with me Griss?" She asked, raining kisses all over his face.

"I'm with you." He whispered breathlessly. "Not to mention willing." He chuckled.

She smiled against his mouth and kissed him.

****

THE END


End file.
